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My plans for the future. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

My plans for the future. To what extent do you agree or disagree? K2rN
My name is Svetlana. I am a student. I study in Donetsk. I am 19 years old. I am a student of the third year of study. I have a lot of plans for future. And my first dream is to graduate from the university and start working as an economist. My future profession is my own choice. I study with pleasure. I would like to earn my own money and become more independent. Nowadays everyone dreams about a successful career. I also want to become a very good economist. I like to communicate with people, so I will be happy to organize and lead a project in the sphere of economics. I am also fond of foreign languages, English and German. I plan to visit Germany and the USA in order to practice my language skills and learn something new about the customs and traditions of these countries. I want to see the famous Statue of Liberty and other places of historical interest with my own eyes. When I succeed in my career, I plan to create a family and have children. My parents have three children. I think we are a united and friendly family. Each evening we gather together in our kitchen and discuss our plans for the next day. I also would like to have such family traditions that will unite my family. If I realize all my plans, I will become happy. And then, perhaps, I will plan something new for future.
My name is Svetlana. I am a student. I study in Donetsk.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am 19 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am a student of the third year of study.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plans
for future. And my
first
dream is to graduate from the university and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
working as an economist. My future profession is my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
choice. I study with pleasure. I would like to earn my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
money and become more independent.

Nowadays everyone dreams about a successful career. I
also
want to become a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
economist. I like to communicate with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I will be happy to organize and lead a project in the sphere of economics.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am
also
fond of foreign languages, English and German.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plan
to visit Germany and the USA in order to practice my language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and learn something new about the customs and traditions of these countries.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
Statue of Liberty and other places of historical interest with my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
eyes.

When I succeed in my career, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plan
to create a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and have children. My parents have three children. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
we are a united and friendly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. Each evening we gather together in our kitchen and discuss our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plans
for the
next
day. I
also
would like to have such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
traditions that will unite my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. If I realize all my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plans
, I will become happy. And then, perhaps, I will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plan
something new for future.

IELTS essay My plans for the future. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
247 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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