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My name is Wina Dian Savitri. People usually call me Wina. I was born 34 years ago in a small village called Mangaran, located at the north of the city center of Situbondo.

My name is Wina Dian Savitri. People usually call me Wina. I was born 34 years ago in a small village called Mangaran, located at the north of the city center of Situbondo. Kw2pk
My name is Wina Dian Savitri. People usually call me Wina. I was born 34 years ago in a small village called Mangaran, located at the north of the city center of Situbondo. Since I was at kindergarten, my parents decided to send me to good schools in the city. The problem was the locations were far far away. It’s about 9 KM from my village home. There’s almost no problem during my kindergarten and elementary school, because my parents usually take me to school. However, when I was at junior school, I had to make effort myself to go to school. Bike is the only way, since I didn’t allowed to take the motor cycle. Beside of that, there were no public transportation that could take me there. In short, it takes 30 – 60 minutes by bike, depend on the wind situation. I remember I had to wake up at 5 a. m. and should already went at 5: 30 a. m. The school would start at 6: 45 a. m. I should pass through a very wide paddy rice field to reach the school. Bad things usually happen when the wind blowed against my direction or from the sides, because the bike became very hard to pedal. Other than that, because the roads were relatively empty, sometimes bad people came to disturb my way. Fortunately, my hardworks during my junior and high school had paid. I got
My name is
Possible spelling mistake found.
Wina
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dian
Possible spelling mistake found.
Savitri
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
usually
call me
Possible spelling mistake found.
Wina
. I
was born
34 years ago in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
village called
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mangaran
, located at the north of the city center of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Situbondo
. Since I was at kindergarten, my parents decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
in the city. The problem was the locations were
Possible typo: you repeated a word
far far
away. It’s about 9 KM from my village home. There’s almost no problem during my kindergarten and elementary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
my parents
usually
take me to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
However
, when I was at junior
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, I had to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
effort myself to go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Bike is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way, since I didn’t
The verb 'didn't' requires base form of this verb: "allow"
allowed
to take the motor cycle. Beside of that, there were no public transportation that could take me there. In short, it takes 30 – 60 minutes by bike, depend on the wind situation. I remember I had to wake up at 5 a. m. and should already went at 5: 30 a. m. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
at 6: 45 a. m. I should pass through a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
wide paddy rice field to reach the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Bad
things
usually
happen when the wind
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "blew", the past tense form of the verb 'blow'?
blowed
against my direction or from the sides,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the bike became
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to pedal. Other than that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the roads were
relatively
empty,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
came to disturb my way.
Fortunately
, my
Possible spelling mistake found.
hardworks
during my junior and high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
had paid. I
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
got
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IELTS essay My name is Wina Dian Savitri. People usually call me Wina. I was born 34 years ago in a small village called Mangaran, located at the north of the city center of Situbondo.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
239 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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