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Life has been changing for a while in many areas.

Life has been changing for a while in many areas. WybBe
Life has been changing for a while in many areas. The degree of following and obey the rules of the societies is one of these areas. Some people agree that the rules that societies today expect young people to follow and obey are too strict, and some people do not. It depnds on the lens through which one is looking. For me, I disagree with the statment because of two reasons, which I will explore in the subsequent paragraphs. To start with, young people now well a ware of their rights. School has been techaing the students their rights for a while. The youth now know what they should follow and what they should not. For example, my son, Adam, was angry because I did not give him his allowance before a week, because he palyed extra hour on his X-box. He came to me and told me that he is demanding of his right of allowance. In addition, he told me that his school teatch him that this is his right due to the fact that he is still young to work. We can learn from this example that youth now are not just obeying to any rules, becasue they know their rights. The other reason is law protetion. Young people who are living in this contomprary age know that there are laws and regulation, that protect thems and their rights. I have to admitt that my opinion in this matter has been profoundly affected by my personal experience. I forced to wear Hijab since the primary school, I had to obey to our strict social rules. When I grown up, I take off the Hijab. My father was so angry, but he could not do any thing due to the fact that I told him that the law will protect me if he would try to force me to obey. If there were not any laws protect me, I would strictly follow this social rule. To sum up, young people now are not strictly forced to obey or follow the rules of the societies, because they well educated and know their rights, and there are laws and regualtion protect their freedom as well.
Life has been changing for a while in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
areas. The degree of following and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
obey
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
of the societies is one of these areas.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the
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rules
that societies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
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follow
and
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obey
are too strict, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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people
do not. It
Possible spelling mistake found.
depnds
on the lens through which one is looking. For me, I disagree with the
Possible spelling mistake found.
statment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of two reasons, which I will explore in the subsequent paragraphs.

To
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start
with,
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young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
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now
well a ware of their
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rights
. School has been
Possible spelling mistake found.
techaing
the students their
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rights
for a while. The youth
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now
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know
what they should
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follow
and what they should not.
For example
, my son, Adam, was angry
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I did not give him his allowance
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
a week,
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because
he
Possible spelling mistake found.
palyed
extra hour on his X-box. He came to me and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
me that he is demanding of his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
of allowance.
In addition
, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
me that his school
Possible spelling mistake found.
teatch
him that this is his
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right
due to the fact that he is
still
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young
to work. We can learn from this example that youth
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now
are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
obeying to any
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rules
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
becasue
they
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know
their rights.

The other reason is
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law
Possible spelling mistake found.
protetion
.
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Young
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people
who are living in this
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contomprary
age
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know
that there are
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laws
and regulation, that
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protect
Possible spelling mistake found.
thems
and their
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rights
. I
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have to
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admitt
that my opinion in this matter has been
profoundly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by my personal experience. I forced
Did you mean "wearing"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'force' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to wear
Hijab since the primary school, I had to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
obey
to our strict social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
. When I
Possible grammatical error. You used a past participle without using any required verb ('be' or 'have'). Did you mean "grew"?
grown
up, I take off the Hijab. My father was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
angry,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he could not do
Did you mean "anything"?
any thing
due to the fact that I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
him that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
me if he would try to force me to
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obey
. If there were not any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
me, I would
strictly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
this social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
are not
strictly
forced to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
obey
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
follow
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
of the societies,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well educated
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
know
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rights
, and there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
regualtion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
protect
their freedom
as well
.
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IELTS essay Life has been changing for a while in many areas.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
365 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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