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My hobby is playing football

My hobby is playing football OyYM3
My name is Minh. I wanna talk to you my hobby. For me, hobby is an activity that you like to do and i think each person needs to have 1 hobby at least to improve the creation of each person. And my hobby is playing football. Playing football is one of the most popular hobby in the world, especially for boys and male teenagers. Nowadays, it becomes a job and becomes the most popular individual sport in the world. I usually play football in my leisure time. I play this sport with my friend who is very like sports. I’ve played football since I was 9 years old and it made impression on me at first because of the way to play it. It’s very easy that you only use your foot to kick the ball to the goal. But after a few time, you need to practice how to shoot exactly, how to control the ball, . . . and you will find it hard in there. If you want to follow this hobby, you will take more effort into it. . I find playing football interesting, helpful and I’m accdicted to it. Of course that in the future I will continue playing football. I hope that COVID-19 pandemic will disappear, so I can play football with my friends
My name is
Possible spelling mistake found.
Minh
. I wanna talk to you my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobby
. For me,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobby
is an activity that you like to do and
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
each person needs to have 1
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hobby
at least to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the creation of each person. And my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobby
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
is one of the most popular
Please check whether a plural form of 'hobby' should be used.
hobby
in the world,
especially
for boys and male
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
. Nowadays, it becomes a job and becomes the most popular individual sport in the world. I
usually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
in my leisure time. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
this sport with my friend who is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
like sports.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
’ve played
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
since I was 9 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and it made impression on me at
first
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
it. It’s
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easy that you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
your foot to kick the ball to the goal.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
after a
Possible agreement error. The noun time seems to be countable; consider using: "few times".
few time
, you need to practice how to shoot exactly, how to control the ball
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
and
you will find it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
in there. If you want to follow this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hobby
, you will take more effort into it.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
I find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
interesting, helpful and I’m
Possible spelling mistake found.
accdicted
to it.
Of course
that in the future I will continue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
. I hope that COVID-19 pandemic will disappear,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
football
with my
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
friends
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IELTS essay My hobby is playing football

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
220 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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