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MUSIC HAS BEEN AND WILL CONTINUE TO BE THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE OF MANKIND. TO WHAT EXTEND DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

MUSIC HAS BEEN AND WILL CONTINUE TO BE THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE OF MANKIND. PgrdB
Music is a language of expression which bring people together. Without any language barriers music can convey any form of an emotions like love, sadness, happiness, patriotism, traditional, cultural and many. Music is a creation of nature, for instance, birds chirping, echo, thunders, water waves etc. It is used in many practices from healing to entertainment. From ancient period to till today music has great influence on everyone’s life without any language of communication and also it is used in the fields of medical, yoga, entertainment, cultural and traditional. According to medical sciences, a person who is mentally unstable due various reasons like stress, anxiety and depression can be cured by soothing sounds of nature. Also meditation with light music helps in relaxing one’s mental health. Besides, each country has its own style of music like national anthem, cultural, entertainment and traditional. For instance, any country before playing sport they sing national anthem to promote an emotion of patriarch, it motivates them to give their best to win the match. If we talk about the cultural and traditional music, India has a wide variety of folk songs which are played during festivals and while worshipping god. On the other hand, music media of entertainment industry has widely spread its wings world wide. Irrespective of language people are listening to the music of other languages. For example, Americans love to listen to Bollywood music and most of the countries like listening to Hollywood music for its tune and lyrics. From years ago, people are using music as a mode to express their emotions to one an another. Personally, I sang a song for my dad on his birthday to express how important he is in my life and it was an overwhelming moment to him and I generally listen to music whenever I feel emotionally low and it eventually boosts up my mood. I conclude with the statement that I believe, music helps in promoting unity between any group of people from different regions and cultures without communication. Also its playing major role in healing process of humans mental health. I also believe that god has created music in nature to heal every soul who are suffering for different reasons.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
of expression which bring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
together. Without any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
barriers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
can convey any form of an emotions like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
, sadness, happiness, patriotism,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Music
is a creation of nature,
for instance
, birds chirping, echo, thunders, water waves etc. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
practices from healing to entertainment.

From ancient period to till
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
has great influence on everyone’s life without any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
of communication and
also
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in the fields of medical, yoga, entertainment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
. According to medical sciences, a person who is mentally unstable due various reasons like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
, anxiety and depression can
be cured
by soothing sounds of nature.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
meditation with light
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in relaxing one’s mental health.
Besides
, each country has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
style of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
like national anthem,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
, entertainment and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
.
For instance
, any country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
playing sport they sing national anthem to promote an emotion of patriarch, it motivates them to give their best to win the match. If we talk about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, India has a wide variety of folk songs which
are played
during festivals and while
Possible spelling mistake. 'worshipping' is British English.
worshipping
god.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
media of entertainment industry has
widely
spread its wings
Did you mean "worldwide"?
world wide
. Irrespective of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are listening to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
of other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
languages
.
For example
, Americans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to listen to Bollywood
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and most of the countries like listening to Hollywood
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
for its tune and lyrics. From years ago,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
as a mode to express their emotions to one
One of these determiners is redundant in this context. Choose only one: "." or "another .".
an another.
Personally
, I sang a song for my dad on his birthday to express how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
he is in my life and it was an overwhelming moment to him and I
generally
listen to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
whenever I feel
emotionally
low and it
eventually
boosts up my mood.

I conclude with the statement that I believe,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in promoting unity between any group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
regions and cultures without communication.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
its playing major role in healing process of humans mental health. I
also
believe that god has created
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
in nature to heal every soul who are suffering for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
reasons.
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IELTS essay MUSIC HAS BEEN AND WILL CONTINUE TO BE THE UNIVERSAL LANGUAGE OF MANKIND.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
369 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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