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More and more people prefer to read ebooks rather than paper books. What are the reasons for this? What problems can this cause for libraries? v.2

More and more people prefer to read ebooks rather than paper books. What are the reasons for this? What problems can this cause for libraries? v. 2
Nowadays, more and more readers prefer to employ digital versions of books for reading. They find it considerably comfortable than using of paper-covered books and believe that the last ones are old-fashioned. However, there are both pros and cons of this essence. In my essay, I will discuss some of the reasons why electronic books have become more popular today and some of the challenges to be overstepped. I will start by looking at the advantages of pixel publications. One of the main positives is that the usage of this edition type is more convenient: it provides a great opportunity to bring books at school, to work or read them on the road. In addition, downloading magazines on an electronic carrier is the most fastest way of acquisition it. Secondly, purchasing of e-books can be free in many cases. The Internet is open-space resource and numerous websites permit to install digital interpretation of newspapers and books. Besides, if there is no possibility to download book for free, it would cost cheaper than the paper version anyway, because you do not pay extra for paper-cover. Turning to the other side of the argument, depreciation of real books is a major problem today. A huge amount of profit and trade deals are lost by bookshops. In the end, numerous number of sellers just have to be a bankrupt, if this declining trend would be continuous. Another issue is that constant exploitation of pixel devices can cause serious eye diseases. In other words, people’s vision could be deteriorated in the case of the permanent digital version of the reading. All things considered, relevance and importance of e-books are increasing in today’s world. However, people have to be mindful about the benefits of paper-covered books. Personally, I believe that the best would be usage of both versions and periodically switching from one to another.
Nowadays, more and more readers prefer to employ digital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
versions
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
for reading. They find it
considerably
Use "(comfortable)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
comfortable
than using of paper-covered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and believe that the last ones are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
-fashioned.
However
, there are both pros and cons of this essence. In my essay, I will discuss
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
reasons why electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
have become more popular
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
and
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
challenges to
be overstepped
.

I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
by looking at the advantages of pixel publications. One of the main positives is that the usage of this edition type is more convenient: it provides a great opportunity to bring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
at school, to work or read them on the road.
In addition
, downloading magazines on an electronic carrier is the
Use only "fastest" (without 'most') when you use the superlative.
most fastest
way of acquisition it.

Secondly
, purchasing of e-books can be free in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cases. The Internet is open-space resource and numerous websites permit
Did you mean "installing"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'permit' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to install
digital interpretation of newspapers and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
.
Besides
, if there is no possibility to download
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
for free, it would cost cheaper than the paper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
version
anyway,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
you do not pay extra for paper-cover.

Turning to the other side of the argument, depreciation of real
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
is a major problem
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. A huge amount of profit and trade deals
are lost
by bookshops. In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, numerous number of sellers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be a bankrupt, if this declining trend would be continuous.

Another issue is that constant exploitation of pixel devices can cause serious eye diseases.
In other words
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s vision could
be deteriorated
in the case of the permanent digital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
version
of the reading.

All things considered, relevance and importance of e-books are increasing in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be mindful about the benefits of paper-covered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
.
Personally
, I believe that the best would be usage of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
versions
and
periodically
switching from one to another.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
One should not aim at being possible to understand but at being impossible to misunderstand.
Marcus Fabius Quintilian

IELTS essay More and more people prefer to read ebooks rather than paper books. What are the reasons for this? What problems can this cause for libraries? v. 2

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
310 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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