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Money control in countries

Money control in countries o6DoX
At the present time, money plays vital role for the countries, which is give us lots of facilities and services. However, healthy overseas gives lots of money to the poor people but it does not solve the poverty while there are other ways the development overseas should help to the poor people. I am totally agree with the given notion and my justification of agree statement I discuss in the below paragraphs To begin with, why devloped countries give money to the poor people well the first and foremost reason is that they are believe that if we are giving money to the poor people we can reduce the poverty leval in the country. For instance, this can be avident by times of india in north- koriya, the government of North coriya giving around 100000 million dollars to the poor people they think that if we are giving money to the poor people we boost our economy. On the other hand, it is not proper solution to reduce the poverty if government provide daily basis things such as glossary and hosuse. for instance in india, the government of India provide huge of facilities to the poor people such as glossary, houses and daily needs products so it is good rather than giving money. As well as if government provide money to the poor people they can not doing work in their life. Although, in india there are huge of poor people do not going to the work because government provide all things which they want so it effect on their life To summarise, it is obvious that, giving money to the poor people it's not proper solutions to decrease poverty, there are another ways available to reduce poverty from my perspective if government provide daily basis things so we can reduce poverty level in the country.
At the present time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
plays vital role for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, which is give us lots of facilities and services.
However
, healthy overseas gives lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it does not solve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
while there are other ways the development overseas should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. I am
totally
Consider using a past participle here: "agreed".
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
notion and my justification of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
statement I discuss in the below
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
paragraphs


To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, why
Possible spelling mistake found.
devloped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
well the
first
and foremost reason is that they are
Consider using a past participle here: "believed".
believe
that if we are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
Possible spelling mistake found.
leval
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
For instance
, this can be
Possible spelling mistake found.
avident
by times of
Possible spelling mistake found.
india
in north-
Possible spelling mistake found.
koriya
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
of North
Possible spelling mistake found.
coriya
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
around 100000 million dollars to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that if we are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
we boost our economy.

On the other hand
, it is not proper solution to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
daily basis things such as glossary and
Possible spelling mistake found.
hosuse
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
for
instance in
Possible spelling mistake found.
india
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
of India
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
huge of facilities to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
such as glossary,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
and daily needs products
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
As well
as if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
they can not
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "do"
doing
work in their life. Although, in
Possible spelling mistake found.
india
there are huge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
After the auxiliary verb 'do', use the base form of a verb. Did you mean "go"?
going
to the work
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
all things which they want
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it
Did you mean "effects"?
effect
on their life

To
Possible spelling mistake. 'summarise' is British English.
summarise
, it is obvious that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
it's not proper solutions to decrease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
, there are another ways available to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
from my perspective if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
daily basis things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poverty
level in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
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IELTS essay Money control in countries

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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