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Modern technology is now very common in most work places. How do you think this has changed the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much ontechnology? v.4

Modern technology is now very common in most work places. How do you think this has changed the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much ontechnology? v. 4
It is an undeniable fact, the technology is used in almost every workspace ranging from schools to multi-national companies. This advancement has altered methods of carrying various jobs. This essay would highlight some of the changes and analyse if it affects our lifestyle negatively. To begin, the biggest change brought by the introduction of technical devices like laptop, faxes, mobile phones in offices, is in the way of interaction between co-workers. These lead to better collaboration among members as well as clients. Nowadays, employees can connect with others sitting in different branches and avoid miss-communication. Further, different types of computer applications, such as Skype, video conferencing have enhanced the work quality. Moreover, companies can manage and store a large amount of data- information more securely and effectively, therefore, can access it anywhere with a single click. On the other hand, it has some demerits as well. People become lazy and the sedentary work style results in many health problems. For instance, the majority of multi-national workers complain about cervical and back-pain. As per doctors, it is an effect of long hours sitting in front of computers. The second drawback is its effect on our environment, as all the technical devices are working on the source of energy, which is non-renewable and will extinct one day. Therefore, too much dependency on this would be a threat to the future generation. To conclude, it could be stated that though technology has created its room everywhere, however, a close check on it would be advisable for a healthier lifestyle and secure future.
It is an undeniable fact, the technology is
used
in almost every workspace ranging from schools to multi-national
companies
. This advancement has altered methods of carrying various jobs. This essay would highlight
some of the
changes
and
analyse
if it affects our lifestyle
negatively
.

To
begin
, the biggest
change
brought by the introduction of technical devices like laptop, faxes, mobile phones in offices, is in the way of interaction between co-workers. These lead to better collaboration among members
as well
as clients. Nowadays, employees can connect with others sitting in
different
branches and avoid miss-communication.
Further
,
different
types of computer applications, such as Skype, video conferencing have enhanced the work quality.
Moreover
,
companies
can manage and store a large amount of data- information more
securely
and
effectively
,
therefore
, can access it anywhere with a single click.

On the other hand
, it has
some
demerits
as well
.
People
become lazy and the sedentary work style results in
many
health problems.
For instance
, the majority of multi-national workers complain about cervical and back-pain. As per doctors, it is an effect of long hours sitting in front of computers. The second drawback is its effect on our environment, as all the technical devices are working on the source of energy, which is non-renewable and will extinct one day.
Therefore
, too much dependency on this would be a threat to the future generation.

To conclude
, it could
be stated
that though technology has created its room everywhere,
however
, a close
check
on it would be advisable for a healthier lifestyle and secure future.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Modern technology is now very common in most work places. How do you think this has changed the way we work? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much ontechnology? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
259 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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