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Modern technology has a great impact on environment. Some say that people should adopt simple life style to avoid this problem, while others argue that technology itself should provide the solution. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.2

Modern technology has a great impact on environment. Some say that people should adopt simple life style to avoid this problem, while others argue that technology itself should provide the solution. v. 2
Over the decades, latest technology has changed the lifestyle of people and that has created great changes in the environment. Some people believe that we should avoid these inventions to overcome resulting problems while others argue that we should utilize the latest mechanization to find answers to this trouble. I will discuss both the side and will give my opinion at the end. First of all, according to some people, simple lifestyle is the ideal solution of environmental problems. For example, avoiding the use of plastic bags, limited use of vehicles and minimum work of natural resources are the certain ways we can follow to reduce this issue. If we live simple life without relying on applied science, then surely we can get success, because in the past, people did not have such a luxurious lifestyle which could create the environmental issues. To make the modern science available to everyone, today's industries are working day and night and produce tons of carbon dioxide. As a result, we are facing serious issues such as the greenhouse effect. If we live simple life then we do not require such hi-tech equipments and can indirectly reduce emission of carbon in the atmosphere. On the other side, some people suggest that modern technology should be used to overcome this problem. We have latest facilities that can utilize to recycle waste material, water and other natural resource. This way we can reduce the production of the original products in the industries and reduce the effect of green house. Moreover, we should also focus on fuel efficiency, which can help us to reduce carbon levels in the air. For example, CNG is the best alternative of petrol and diesel which is also an Eco friendly fuel. Furthermore, the Internet can help us to reduce paper waste by storing information online. This way, the proper use of technology can lead us to a concrete solution. In conclusion, I think that both approaches are equally effective and depend on situations and circumstances, we should adapt them to solve this issue.
Over the decades,
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
technology has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the lifestyle of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and that has created great
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the environment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that we should avoid these inventions to overcome resulting problems while others argue that we should utilize the latest mechanization to find answers to this trouble. I will discuss both the side and will give my opinion at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, according to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, simple lifestyle is the ideal solution of environmental problems.
For example
, avoiding the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of plastic bags, limited
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of vehicles and minimum work of natural resources are the certain ways we can follow to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
. If we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
simple life without relying on applied science, then
surely
we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
success,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
did not have such a luxurious lifestyle which could create the environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the modern science available to everyone,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's industries are working day and night and produce tons of carbon dioxide.
As a result
, we are facing serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
such as the greenhouse effect. If we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
simple life then we do not require such hi-tech equipments and can
indirectly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
emission of carbon in the atmosphere.

On the other side,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suggest that modern technology should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to overcome this problem. We have
A determiner is probably missing here: "the latest".
latest
facilities that can utilize to recycle waste material, water and other natural resource. This way we can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the production of the original products in the industries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the effect of green
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.
Moreover
, we should
also
focus on fuel efficiency, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
carbon levels in the air.
For example
, CNG is the best alternative of petrol and diesel which is
also
an Eco friendly fuel.
Furthermore
, the Internet can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
paper waste by storing information online. This way, the proper
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of technology can lead us to a concrete solution.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that both approaches are
equally
effective and depend on situations and circumstances, we should adapt them to solve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Modern technology has a great impact on environment. Some say that people should adopt simple life style to avoid this problem, while others argue that technology itself should provide the solution. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
342 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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