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Modern lifestyles are completely different from the way people lived in the past. Some people think the changes have been very positive, while others believe they have been very negative. Discuss both these points of view and give your own opinion. give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. write at least 250 words.

The lifestyles of people nowadays is totally different than people in the old time. There are some discussions which people really benefit from the changes. Because of the rapid growth of technology, the lifestyles of people changed. Everything become more convenience than in the old days. It includs financial system, transportation system, and supply chain system. People do not need to physically queue outside the restaurant for buying food. They can preorder it on the internet. It saves us much time on waiting. In the past, in order to know what is happening in the world, we have to at least buy a newspaper but only know part of the world. Nevertheless, with the internet, we can read every pieces of information around the world. The speed of information spread out is extraordinary fast. However, some people think there are side effects to have such changes. Firstly, people will easily become obesity. As described before, people need not to go out to finish their works. Less exercises are done. Energy input is more than energy output and people will get fat. This may casue physical disease, like heart attack. Beside the physical problem, mental problem may also be caused. As the speedy of information spreading, there is no time for people to take a rest. The stress cumulated and may casue headache. In my opinion, I do agree the advantages are more than the disadvantages. Because I think the disadvantages can be adjected by ourself, nevertheless, we cannot make tasks become convenience with our own power. To conclude, the changes bring both positive and negative effects to human and social. It brings convenience to human, but it also bring physical and mental problem to human. It only depends on how we make a balance between them.
The lifestyles of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
nowadays is
totally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Did you mean ‘different “from”? ‘Different than’ is often considered colloquial style.
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
time. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
discussions which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
really
benefit from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of the rapid growth of technology, the lifestyles of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
. Everything become more convenience than in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
days. It
Possible spelling mistake found.
includs
financial system, transportation system, and supply chain system.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
do not need to
physically
queue outside the restaurant for buying food. They can preorder it on the internet. It saves us much time on waiting. In the past, in order to know what is happening in the world, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
at least
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a newspaper
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
know part of the world.
Nevertheless
, with the internet, we can read every
The noun should probably be in the singular form: “piece”?
pieces
of information around the world. The speed of information spread out is extraordinary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
there are side effects to have such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
easily
become obesity. As
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
described
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need not
Did you mean “go”?
to go
out to finish their works.
Did you mean “fewer”? The noun exercises is countable.
Less
exercises
are done
. Energy input is more than energy output and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
. This may
Possible spelling mistake found.
casue
physical disease, like heart attack. Beside the physical problem, mental problem may
also
be caused
. As the
The phrase ‘the speedy of’ is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between ‘the’ and ‘of’.
speedy
of information spreading, there is no time for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to take a rest. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
cumulated and may
Possible spelling mistake found.
casue
headache.

In my opinion, I do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
the advantages are more than the disadvantages.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the disadvantages can be
Possible spelling mistake found.
adjected
by
The term is non-standard and not widely accepted.
ourself
,
nevertheless
, we cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
tasks become convenience with our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
power.

To conclude
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
bring both
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects to human and social. It brings convenience to human,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
also
After ‘it’, use the third-person verb form “brings”.
bring
physical and mental problem to human. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
depends on how we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a balance between them.
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IELTS essay Modern lifestyles are completely different from the way people lived in the past. Some people think the changes have been very positive, while others believe they have been very negative.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
296 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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