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Missions to explore space are hugely expensive, and there are problems on Earth which demand our attention. The number of these missions needs to be reduced. Do you agree or disagree v.1

The space research and findings are too costly, so its effects on the globe are to be concerned. I totally disagree with the statement because decreasing Astro research won't overcome the problem it will make us back in technological development, even it's economic it shifts our era. The astronauts are making researching regarding the earth history, and differential architecture of the planets and galaxies led us for scientific innovations. First of all, there are lots of articles, about the history of earth sourced in the magazines but those all facts are the outcome of the scientific research conducted by the different organizations. Though it's economic, it's giving information about the earth, different satellites are computing the results. Astronauts have an economic journey and cannot be conducted frequently, but the things that they bring back for us has worthy importance. Pollution level, greenhouse effect, and the earth age are the global concern also the NASA is an organization to conduct research in Astrology and provide huge data. It might be economical but outputs and facts that provide us is a concern subject for future development. Secondly, Those surveys that are conducted gives an output for scientific innovations also being a source for new technologies. Different space has uniqueness and those factors migrate us for the development of new concepts. The concepts of satellites are helping us providing information regarding maps, weather forecast and many more. Such discoveries are reducing our problem like map data helps us to go anywhere and explore the world with a single application. These all are possible with space research, though it's costly than other instant problems. To conclude that, the costly research isn't always useless it's a shift of direction of the positive development. Though space exploring gives us new technological movement and this development can fix the common problem of the globe.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
and findings are too costly,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
its effects on the globe are to
be concerned
. I
totally
disagree with the statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
decreasing
Possible spelling mistake found.
Astro
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
won't overcome the problem it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us back in technological
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
, even
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
economic it shifts our era. The astronauts are making researching regarding the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
history, and differential architecture of the planets and galaxies led us for scientific innovations.

Often, this adverbial phrase is redundant. Consider using “first”.
First of all
, there are lots of articles, about the history of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
sourced in the
Use a comma before ‘but’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
magazines
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
those all facts are the outcome of the scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
conducted by the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
organizations. Though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
economic,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
giving information about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
satellites are computing the results. Astronauts have an economic journey and cannot
be conducted
frequently
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the things that they bring back for us has worthy importance. Pollution level, greenhouse effect, and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
age are the global concern
also
the NASA is an organization to conduct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
in Astrology and provide huge data. It might be economical
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
outputs and facts that provide us is a concern subject for future development.

Secondly
, Those surveys that
are conducted
gives an output for scientific innovations
also
being a source for new technologies.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
has uniqueness and those factors migrate us for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of new concepts. The concepts of satellites are helping us
The verb ‘of’ is used with an infinitive: “to provide” or “provide”.
providing
information regarding maps, weather forecast and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. Such discoveries are reducing our problem like map data
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us to go anywhere and explore the world with a single application. These all are possible with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
, though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
Use “costlier than” to make a comparison with this adjective.
costly than
other instant problems.

To conclude
that, the costly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
isn't always useless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
it's
a shift of direction of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
. Though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
exploring gives us new technological movement and this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fix
the common problem of the globe.
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You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay Missions to explore space are hugely expensive, and there are problems on Earth which demand attention. The number of these missions needs to be reduced.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Meet the criteria
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