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Medical Treatment Nowadays is a blessing or a Curse.

Medical Treatment Nowadays is a blessing or a Curse. Dab87
Medical treatments play a vital role in saving one's life across the globe. It has generated a lot of questions previously and has to be addressed. I personally believe that it is very important to health and to save humanity. There is an advancement in the field of medicine such as other fields, for example, Information technology, that provides benefit to the society. To begin with, medical technology has changed, as were in the past. Identification of the diseases are possible now and can be detected in their early stages that makes higher chances to get better treatment. For instance, people suffered from serious diseases, and they be never known about it, so how they get the treatments for those illnesses. Thus, the advancement has proven that only through the identification of disease, one can take out a solution or cure for it. Another significant point that needs consideration is that it has not only made it easier to identify the diseases, but also helped to get rid of those illnesses. In the past, Cancer had no cure, but now it is a curable disease, many of the patients are now healthy after getting a proper treatment of such disease. We have now a variety of laser treatments to cure the life of humanity. This will lead to live longer and healthier. As a research, 70 countries out of 80 are getting benefits from the internet, moving to the place where they get the best treatment and become healthy as compared to the past. In conclusion, I concur that medical advancement is necessary for the society and the reasons I gave above are in support of my arguments. These clues are way more important and has to be promoted.
Medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatments
play a vital role in saving one's life across the globe. It has generated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
questions previously and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be addressed
. I
personally
believe that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to health and to save humanity. There is an advancement in the field of medicine such as other fields,
for example
, Information technology, that provides benefit to the society.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, medical technology has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
, as were in the past. Identification of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
are possible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
and can
be detected
in their early stages that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
higher chances to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
.
For instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
suffered from serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
, and they be never known about it,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
how they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatments
for those illnesses.
Thus
, the advancement has proven that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
through the identification of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
, one can take out a solution or cure for it.

Another significant point that needs consideration is that it has not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
made it easier to identify the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
diseases
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of those illnesses. In the past, Cancer had no cure,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
it is a curable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the patients are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
healthy after getting a proper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
. We have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
a variety of laser
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatments
to cure the life of humanity. This will lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer and healthier. As a research, 70 countries out of 80 are getting benefits from the internet, moving to the place where they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
and become healthy as compared to the past.

In conclusion
, I concur that medical advancement is necessary for the society and the reasons I gave above are in support of my arguments. These clues are way more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be promoted
.
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IELTS essay Medical Treatment Nowadays is a blessing or a Curse.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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