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Marketing and promotion is the key to a successful business. To what extent do you agree? v.2

Marketing and promotion is the key to a successful business. v. 2
There is an opinion that maketing and special offer is a strategy which could help in successfully operating a business. In my opinion, I completely affirm this viewpoint because it would help create awareness and also help in boosting sales of products. There are several reasons for using this strategies to achieve successin business. Firstly, every product needs to be advertised to the consumers even though it might require planning and resources. This means that communication channels which would be used to reach out to the public need to be created or financed. To illustrate, a business owner need to create face book official page or pay for a TV advert in other to inform people about his products or sevices. Consequently, it would lead to not only sales of goods, but also referrals to people who do not know such goods exist, thereby increasing the companies productivity. Therefore, marketing ans promotion is important to every business. In addition, there is increase in the profit margin of the organization. In other words, promotional offers helps to boost returns although it could also be incur some expenses for the consumers as some people might purchase what they do not need since discounts are attached on the product. Apart from this, it helps to increase the popularity of a product which could expand the business. For example, a product originally manufactured and sold in one state such as Abuja, might become popular in Lagos and Rivers State, thus leading to expansion of the business and they try to meet the demands of the people. Clearly, this a route to a successful business. In conclusion, I completely agree that marketing and promotional offers are a major way to make a business successful as it could help to expand and yield for profit for the business although certain measures, such as paying for adverts, need to done to the appropriate people who will do the publicity.
There is an opinion that
Possible spelling mistake found.
maketing
and special offer is a strategy which could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in
successfully
operating a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
. In my opinion, I completely affirm this viewpoint
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
create awareness and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in boosting sales of products.

There are several reasons for using
Did you mean "these"?
this
strategies to achieve
Possible spelling mistake found.
successin
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
.
Firstly
, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to
be advertised
to the consumers
even though
it might require planning and resources. This means that communication channels which would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to reach out to the public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
be created
or financed. To illustrate, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
owner
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to create face book official page or pay for a TV advert in other to inform
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
or
Possible spelling mistake found.
sevices
.
Consequently
, it would lead to not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
sales of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
referrals to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do not know such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
exist, thereby increasing the
Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean "companies'" or "company's"?
companies
productivity.
Therefore
, marketing ans promotion is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to every business.

In addition
, there is increase in the profit margin of the organization.
In other words
, promotional offers
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to boost returns although it could
also
be
Consider using a past participle here: "incurred".
incur
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
expenses for the consumers as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
what they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
since discounts
are attached
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
. Apart from this, it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to increase the popularity of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
which could expand the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
.
For example
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
originally
manufactured and sold in one state such as Abuja, might become popular in Lagos and Rivers State,
thus
leading to expansion of the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
business and
they try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the demands of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Clearly
, this a route to a successful business.

In conclusion
, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that marketing and promotional offers are a major way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
successful as it could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to expand and yield for profit for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
although certain measures, such as paying for adverts,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
Did you mean "do"?
done
to the appropriate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who will do the publicity.
18Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Marketing and promotion is the key to a successful business. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
322 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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