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Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this effect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this effect local communities? How could this situation be improved? mBD8
A lot of small businesses have been closing down because of their inability to compete with large shopping malls. Most people say they prefer a large shopping centre rather than a local shop. I believe that the biggest shopping malls can give convenient for local people and also the way to improve the local businesses. First of all, large shopping centre can give you a wide range of products and services to customers. Also, giving customers a reasonable price for all their goods because of the economies of scale. For example, canned food or snack which has a lower price than local shops. Moreover, big stores offer perks like occasional sales, sudden drops on certain items price, and shopping loyalty cards. Lastly, large stores offer shoppers almost all they would need, unlike small shops. For instance, the large shopping centre can do financially help the local government while the local shops can't. Secondly, the local government needs to put a cap on the prices of the fundamental products and control them strictly. This will make sure that supermarket chains cannot dictate the pricing and eventually helps local shops to sustain themselves. Also, small businesses can use e-commerce as a new way of shopping by letting the customers do online shopping, it’ll help people who cannot travel for a long distance and benefit the owner itself. To conclude, even though the large shops tend to benefit the community more than local shops and crush small shops to the point of bankruptcy, but small shops can improve the businesses by using a strategic plan be adapted to the current market trend and make it on par with the large supermarkets.
A lot of
small
businesses have been closing down
because
of their inability to compete with
large
shopping
malls. Most
people
say they prefer a
large
shopping
centre
rather
than a
local
shop
. I believe that the biggest
shopping
malls can give convenient for
local
people
and
also
the way to
improve
the
local
businesses.

First of all
,
large
shopping
centre
can give you a wide range of products and services to customers.
Also
, giving customers a reasonable
price
for all their
goods
because
of the economies of scale.
For example
, canned food or snack which has a lower
price
than
local
shops
.
Moreover
,
big
stores offer perks like occasional sales, sudden drops on certain items
price
, and
shopping
loyalty cards.
Lastly
,
large
stores offer shoppers almost all they would need, unlike
small
shops
.
For instance
, the
large
shopping
centre
can do
financially
help
the
local
government
while the
local
shops
can't.

Secondly
, the
local
government
needs to put a cap on the
prices
of the fundamental products and control them
strictly
. This will
make
sure that supermarket chains cannot dictate the pricing and
eventually
helps
local
shops
to sustain themselves.
Also
,
small
businesses can
use
e-commerce as a new way of
shopping
by letting the customers do online
shopping
, it’ll
help
people
who cannot travel for a long distance and benefit the owner itself.

To conclude
,
even though
the
large
shops
tend to benefit the community more than
local
shops
and crush
small
shops
to the point of bankruptcy,
but
small
shops
can
improve
the businesses by using a strategic plan
be adapted
to the
current
market trend and
make
it on par with the
large
supermarkets.
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IELTS essay Many small, local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area. How does this effect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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