Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Many sleep less than in the past. What is the reason behind this? What do you think that do effect on people ?

Many sleep less than in the past. What is the reason behind this? What do you think that do effect on people? 521BA
Many people spend less time of their sleep now compared to last decades because of working more hours at their work place and this results of feeling fatigue. On one hand, this is happening as the numbers of people intend to have more works done on time to be competitive in the market to remain at the high level of the professionalism and this can be done by staying longer at work. Thus, they may get well paid and gain more career prospects. For example, a school teacher attends his coaching classes after finishing his job at school and he has to manage the loads of works in the evening at home as such checking the students homework or prepare for tomorrow’s classes so he gets late on the bed and wakes up early in the morning always. On the other hand, people can feel fatigue as they do not sleep enough or required to their body. Sleeping less actually results of sensing tiredness. For instance, a waiter works till mid-night and wakes up early morning for opening and preparing the restaurant for breakfast which is likely to be exhausted. To conclude, spending less hours as a sleep on our bed than in the past has significantly increased now because people complete more jobs in a day which causes tiredness on our body.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
spend less time of their sleep
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
compared to last decades
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of working more hours at their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
place and this results of feeling fatigue. On one hand, this is happening as the numbers of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
intend to have more works done on time to be competitive in the market to remain at the high level of the professionalism and this can
be done
by staying longer at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
Thus
, they may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
well paid and gain more career prospects.
For example
, a school teacher attends his coaching classes after finishing his job at
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
school and
he
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
manage the loads of works in the evening at home as such checking the students homework or prepare for tomorrow’s classes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
late on the bed and wakes up early in the morning
The adverb 'always' is usually not used at the end of a sentence.
always
.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can feel fatigue as they do not sleep
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
or required to their body. Sleeping less actually results of sensing tiredness.
For instance
, a waiter works till mid-night and wakes up early morning for opening and preparing the restaurant for breakfast which is likely to
be exhausted
.

To conclude
, spending
Did you mean "fewer hours"?
less hours
as a sleep on our bed than in the past has
significantly
increased
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
complete more jobs in a day which causes tiredness on our body.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Many sleep less than in the past. What is the reason behind this? What do you think that do effect on people?

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
223 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Many sleep less than in the past. What is the reason behind this? What do you think that do effect on people ?