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Many schools offer participation in sports as part of the curriculum. However, other schools do not. They claim that their job is to teach skills such as reading and math. Write an essay in which you agree or disagree with the following topic : Learning to play sports teaches valuable life skills.

Many schools offer participation in sports as part of the curriculum. However, other schools do not. They claim that their job is to teach skills such as reading and math. Write an essay in which you agree or disagree with the following topic: Learning to play sports teaches valuable life skills. Ed9Mb
Sports play a crucial role at schools and in our life. Sports will provide people with many benefits which are good for health and life skills. Nowadays, many schools offer activities in sports as part of the curriculum for student to practice. Conversely, other schools disagree and suppose that it is unnecessary. In my opinion, I completely agree that people should spend more time on learning to play sports which will bring some huge benefits and valuable life skills. Playing sports will teach us valuable life skills and bring us many benefits which is good for health. First, playing sports frequently help us to strengthen our bones, enhance blood circulation and avoid us from diabetes which are increased in most people, especially teenagers. They also help you to sleep well, reduce your stress and protect you against depression. Sometimes you feel useless and don’t want to do anything so playing sports give you a chance to combat with negative emotions. In addition, while playing sports, you have to use communicative and flexible skills to do teamwork and interact with other members to win the goal; those skills promote you to work efficiently. Furthermore, sports give us a chance to improve leadership and teamworks skills, it will be useful for study and work. Last but not least, playing sports help you to manage time to balance busy schedules and relaxation. However, sports usually is not supported. People claim that playing sports at school is not essential and waste time because they reckon student should be focus more on learning skills like math or reading. Moreover, they believe that their children may get injured or broken bones while playing sports so they strongly disagree with this statement. In conclusion, it is necessary and important to play sports which can bring us many huge benefits and life skills in study, work and our daily life. People should spend more time playing sports to avoid any impact on our health. In particular, schools should add more activities, competitions of sports for student to play sports which will make students stronger and more active.
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Sports
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play
a crucial role at
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schools
and in our
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life
.
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Sports
will provide
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people
with
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many
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benefits
which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for health and
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life
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skills
. Nowadays,
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many
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schools
offer activities in
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sports
as part of the curriculum for
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student
to practice.
Conversely
, other
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schools
disagree and suppose that it is unnecessary. In my opinion, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
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people
should spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on learning to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
which will bring
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some
huge
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benefits
and valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

Playing
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sports
will teach us valuable
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life
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skills
and bring us
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many
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benefits
which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for health.
First
,
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playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
frequently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to strengthen our bones, enhance blood circulation and avoid us from diabetes which
are increased
in most
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people
,
especially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
. They
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you to sleep well,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and protect you against depression.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
you feel useless and don’t want to do anything
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
give you a chance to combat with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
emotions.
In addition
, while
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playing
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sports
, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
communicative and flexible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
to do teamwork and interact with other members to win the goal; those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
promote you to work
efficiently
.
Furthermore
,
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sports
give us a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
leadership and
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teamworks
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skills
, it will be useful for study and work. Last
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but
not least,
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playing
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sports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you to manage
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time
to balance busy schedules and relaxation.

However
,
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sports
usually
is not supported.
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People
claim that
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playing
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sports
at
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school
is not essential and waste
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time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they reckon
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student
should be focus more on learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
like math or reading.
Moreover
, they believe that their children may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
injured or broken bones while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
strongly
disagree with this statement.

In conclusion
, it is necessary and
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important
to
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play
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sports
which can bring us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
huge
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benefits
and
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life
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skills
in study, work and our daily
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life
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
should spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
to avoid any impact on our health.
In particular
,
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schools
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
more activities, competitions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
stronger and more active.
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IELTS essay Many schools offer participation in sports as part of the curriculum. However, other schools do not. They claim that their job is to teach skills such as reading and math. Write an essay in which you agree or disagree with the following topic: Learning to play sports teaches valuable life skills.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
349 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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