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Many people think it takes time and money to preserve the old buildings, so we should knock down the old buildings and build modern ones instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people think it takes time and money to preserve the old buildings, so we should knock down the old buildings and build modern ones instead. GKjm
It is noticeable that there are many old buildings in the modern cities. Whether they should be knocked down to make a way for new buildings triggers an intense discussion. I believe although some old buildings are not suitable for living, many of them need to be protected regarding their economic and cultural value Admittedly, some old buildings should be torn down due to the safety concerns. Since the architecture technique in the past was not sophisticated enough, the buildings exposes to the danger such as paint falling off, water leakage and poor electricity system. In another words, these buildings could not service the public any more. However, it is not the whole picture. There are still many more historical buildings deserve our protection, and we should not be blind to their worth. Many historical buildings should be reserved since they can contribute to economic development in those regions. As the symbol of the cities, many old buildings can attract tourists from all over the world. For example, when people visit the classical buildings such as the big Ben in London, the summer palace in Beijing and the Eiffel tower in Paris, they need to pay for the tickets and consume in the surroundings, bringing more revenue for government. Moreover, government should refurbish the historical heritages due to the implied culture. Visiting old buildings is a vivid way to help us learn about our history. For example, Qilou, a tradition building in Guangzhou, was introduced by colonists because they didn’t get used to the hot weather there. This can remind us of history the colonization. If ancient buildings were knocked down, our next generations could only picture how our ancestors live by their imagination. In conclusion, many historical buildings serve the functions as economic progress and cultural icons, so government should evaluate their value before replacing them with modern buildings.
It is noticeable that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
in the modern cities. Whether they should
be knocked
down to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a way for new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
triggers an intense discussion. I believe although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
are not suitable for living,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them need to
be protected
regarding their economic and cultural
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
value


Admittedly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
should
be torn
down due to the safety concerns. Since the architecture technique in the past was not sophisticated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
exposes to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
such as paint falling off, water leakage and poor electricity system. In
Did you mean "in other words"?
another words
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
could not service the public
Did you mean the adverb "anymore"?
any more
.
However
, it is not the whole picture. There are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
deserve our protection, and we should not be blind to their worth.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
should
be reserved
since they can contribute to economic development in those regions. As the symbol of the cities,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
can attract tourists from all over the world.
For example
, when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
visit the classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
such as the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
big Ben
in London, the summer palace in Beijing and the
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Eiffel tower
in Paris, they need to pay for the tickets and consume in the surroundings, bringing more revenue for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

Moreover
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should refurbish the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
heritages due to the implied culture. Visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
is a vivid way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us learn about our history.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Qilou
, a tradition
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
in Guangzhou,
was introduced
by colonists
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they didn’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to the hot weather there. This can remind us of history the colonization. If ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
were knocked
down, our
next
generations could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
picture how our ancestors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
by their imagination.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
serve the functions as economic progress and cultural icons,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should evaluate their value
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
replacing them with modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
.
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IELTS essay Many people think it takes time and money to preserve the old buildings, so we should knock down the old buildings and build modern ones instead.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
310 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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