Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Many people say that the only way to guarantee getting a good job is to complete a course of university education. Others claim that it is better to start work after school and gain experience in the world of work. v.3

Many people say that the only way to guarantee getting a good job is to complete a course of university education. Others claim that it is better to start work after school and gain experience in the world of work. v. 3
At recent years, there is an ongoing debate whether by completing further study in university or by joining the workload directly will lead someone to be employed in a good job. I personally believe that continuing higher study in a course at a university will alleviate the opportunity to get involved in the labour market. The light competitiveness in work field, in some ways, increases the need for qualified workers. Moved by this trigger, universities develop the quality of the students by improving the specialisations and by extending the variety of courses. Taken as an example, business courses have been expanding the field of study in a wide range of majors such as public health business which provides the participants to focus on hospital management, pharmacy business, etc. or social based entrepreneur which develops the candidates to build their social-based businesses by a small amount of money. On the other hand, undeniably, students in university seem to be the lack of practical experiences in working environment. Being an employee means more of responsibilities, job deadlines, etc. and there are several consequences if they show bad performances. To solve this case, internship programmes and core soft skill training can be effective ways out. University faces challenges to keep improving the curricula in order to prepare the students with work experiences by entering the utmost graduate students with 3 months working programmes in thrived companies as well as with several working skills training such as leadership training. To sum up, in spite of the growth of demand for universities' graduates in good offer jobs, it is inevitable that they have more positive sides to fit them in such enormous opportunities.
At recent years, there is an ongoing debate whether by completing
further
study in
university
or by joining the workload
directly
will lead someone to
be employed
in a
good
job. I
personally
believe that continuing higher study in a course at a
university
will alleviate the opportunity to
get
involved in the
labour
market.

The light competitiveness in work field, in
some
ways, increases the need for qualified workers.
Moved
by this trigger,
universities
develop the quality of the
students
by improving the
specialisations
and by extending the variety of courses. Taken as an example,
business
courses have been expanding the field of study in a wide range of majors such as public health
business
which provides the participants to focus on hospital management, pharmacy
business
, etc. or social based entrepreneur which develops the candidates to build their social-based
businesses
by a
small
amount of money.

On the other hand
,
undeniably
,
students
in
university
seem to be the lack of practical experiences in working environment. Being an employee means more of responsibilities, job deadlines, etc. and there are several consequences if they
show
bad
performances. To solve this case, internship
programmes
and core soft
skill
training can be effective ways out.
University
faces challenges to
keep
improving the curricula in order to prepare the
students
with work experiences by entering the utmost graduate
students
with 3 months working
programmes
in thrived
companies
as well
as with several working
skills
training such as leadership training.

To sum up,
in spite of
the growth of demand for universities' graduates in
good
offer jobs, it is inevitable that they have more
positive
sides to fit them in such enormous opportunities.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people say that the only way to guarantee getting a good job is to complete a course of university education. Others claim that it is better to start work after school and gain experience in the world of work. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts