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Many people from the rural areas are migrating to the city to live. Do the advantages OUTWEIGH the disadvantages?

Many people from the rural areas are migrating to the city to live. Do the advantages OUTWEIGH the disadvantages? ewkk7
Today, individuals from rural areas are increasingly migrating to metropolitan areas. Although this creates a slew of opportunities for talented residents, it cannot eclipse the challenges facing the urban area. As population density in megacities grows, there are a multitude of obstacles, most recently the consequences of population explosion. Firstly, the air pollution in affluent cities is extremely problematic, which causes environmental pollution which affects human health and causes respiratory diseases. Additionally, the traffic situation is also one of the alarming concerns when the rate of traffic congestion in these places is growing and causing countless serious accidents that cannot be curtailed. If urban areas lack sufficient land to support skyscrapers, they will lose the habitat of many terrestrial and aerial animals, subsequently causing ecological imbalance. A classical case is Australia, a country that attracts a lot of workers in the vicinity but also has many animals on the red list such as kangaroos and koalas. The drawbacks of this dilemma also appear in places where the population is sparse. The substantial reduction in the rural labor force makes these obsolete places even more antiquated and causes a marked disparity of wealth in a country. Namely, the lack of medical facilities as well as poor living conditions lead to health problems like malnutrition. In some provinces or mountainous areas, which lack integration opportunities and little government attention, this is evident. As for the positive aspects, this phenomenon plays a role in boosting the economy when labor migration is integrated in the country's core economic strategies. The first advantage is the leap in wisdom in urban areas when it is attracted by many gifted and fully qualified human resources in other regions and becomes state-of-the-art. In addition, service development by migrant workers spending at destination will also lead to the development of other service industries. To conclude, migration issues in many major cities cause massive subliminal effects that cannot be discounted.
Today
, individuals from rural
areas
are
increasingly
migrating to metropolitan
areas
. Although this creates a slew of opportunities for talented residents, it cannot eclipse the challenges facing the urban area.

As population density in
megacities
grows, there are a multitude of obstacles, most recently the consequences of population explosion.
Firstly
, the air pollution in affluent cities is
extremely
problematic, which
causes
environmental pollution which affects human health and
causes
respiratory diseases.
Additionally
, the traffic situation is
also
one of the alarming concerns when the rate of traffic congestion in these places is growing and causing countless serious accidents that cannot
be curtailed
. If urban
areas
lack sufficient land to support skyscrapers, they will lose the habitat of
many
terrestrial and aerial animals,
subsequently
causing ecological imbalance. A classical case is Australia, a country that attracts
a lot of
workers in the vicinity
but
also
has
many
animals on the red list such as kangaroos and koalas.

The drawbacks of this dilemma
also
appear in places where the population is sparse. The substantial reduction in the rural labor force
makes
these obsolete places even more antiquated and
causes
a marked disparity of wealth in a country.
Namely
, the lack of medical facilities
as well
as poor living conditions lead to health problems like malnutrition. In
some
provinces or mountainous
areas
, which lack integration opportunities and
little
government
attention, this is evident.

As for the
positive
aspects, this phenomenon plays a role in boosting the economy when labor migration
is integrated
in the country's core economic strategies. The
first
advantage is the leap in wisdom in urban
areas
when it
is attracted
by
many
gifted and
fully
qualified human resources in other regions and becomes state-of-the-art.
In addition
, service development by migrant workers spending at destination will
also
lead to the development of other service industries.

To conclude
, migration issues in
many
major cities
cause
massive subliminal effects that cannot
be discounted
.
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IELTS essay Many people from the rural areas are migrating to the city to live. Do the advantages OUTWEIGH the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
320 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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