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Many people believe that women make better then men. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people believe that women make better then men. XDVdg
In contemporary times, there has been heating discussion, between father and mother who makes good job for caring babies. Some individual perceive that women are better vis-a-vis men. I partially agree with this statement and will be discussed in upcoming paragraphs. To embark, a few people believe that months are more responsible in lieu of fathers. There are ample of reasons, the first and foremost one is that the months has been attaching with their child. To explain this, in the fast paced World men have follow very hectic schedule, while mother have been spending quality time with their child since they born. Therefore, mothers are easily understand of child's feeling, they know very well child what they want. A child able to share their fears and secrets with mother. Furthermore, a child is influenced by their mother, as a result they teachers many things from mother, which is essential for holistic development. On the other hand, protection and financially aid are being provided by father, when child is growing up in commence years. It is helpful in built a career which mother can not be done. On account of, lot's of knowledge is obtained by father from the education, social events and on the internet, these things are helpful for children. Moreover, the role of fathers very strict towards the children. Whenever child is doing wrong thing that time child is punished, which is quite crucial to child for bright future. In conclusion, both parents have been playing a vital role for children's development. Mothers are responsible for behavior and nature, while father's teachers a lot about how to survive in cut-throat compilation
In contemporary times, there has been heating discussion, between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
job for caring babies.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
Did you mean "individuals"?
individual
perceive that women are better
'vis-a-vis' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "vis-à-vis"
vis-a-vis
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement and will
be discussed
in upcoming paragraphs.

To embark, a few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that months are more responsible in lieu of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fathers
. There are ample of reasons, the
first
and foremost one is that the months has been attaching with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
this, in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
paced World
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
have
Use past participle here: "followed".
follow
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
hectic schedule, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
have been spending quality time with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
since they born.
Therefore
, mothers are
easily
Consider using a past participle here: "understood".
understand
of child's feeling, they know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
what they want. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
able to share their fears and secrets with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
.
Furthermore
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is influenced
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
,
as a result
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they teachers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
, which is essential for holistic development.

On the other hand
, protection and
financially
aid are
being provided
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is growing up in commence years. It is helpful in built a career which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mother
can not
be done
. On account of,
Did you mean "lots"?
lot's
of knowledge
is obtained
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
father
from the education, social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and on the internet, these things are helpful for children.
Moreover
, the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fathers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
strict towards the children. Whenever
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
thing that time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is punished
, which is quite crucial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
for bright future.

In conclusion
, both parents have been playing a vital role for children's development. Mothers are responsible for behavior and nature, while father's teachers a lot about how to survive in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
-throat
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
compilation
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IELTS essay Many people believe that women make better then men.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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