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Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both society and individuals. To what extent do you agree. v.1

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both society and individuals. v. 1
In the last ten years, it is a fact that social media platforms has evolved and became the main sources of connection between people and their communities overall. Whilst these avenues connected people, they have also created new issues that are far more complicated and sensitive. Therefore, I completely agree with the given statement. In this essay, I shall explain a few underlying pain points relating to this topic and provide relevant examples as required. There are two main disadvantages of human connectivity via the internet. Firstly, they are open and accessible to everyone - even the cyber-criminals, who can potentially exploit the vulnerable. For example, in India, tens of people were lynched in 2017, due to fake news circulated on Whatsapp (a chat app on smart phone). All thanks to these apps, fraudsters can now mobilise crowds and cause harm to the society. Secondly, they can expose private information to the public which otherwise should stay private. Using this information, lawbreakers can gain access to personal venues such as banking and can withdraw funds. Take an example of the recent incident in Singapore, where scammers broke into a bank by using cloned identification cards using information obtained from their customers on Instagram. On the other hand, it is all not doom and gloom by using social networks, they can actually be helpful in many ways. One such application, for example, is in deploying it to prevent crime. For instance, China polices most of their internet, where they analyse patters and identify potential issues before they make their way to the main stream. However, it is important to note that despite all these benefits, these venues have far more complicated and sensitive then their advantages. In conclusion, as explained above, it is clearly certain that the negatives of social networks outnumber the positives. Hence, I strongly agree with the given statement and suggest the people should be careful about how they use these platforms.
In the last ten years, it is a fact that social media platforms has evolved and became the main sources of
connection between
people
and their communities
overall
. Whilst these avenues connected
people
, they have
also
created new issues that are far more complicated and sensitive.
Therefore
, I completely
agree
with the
given
statement. In this essay, I shall
explain
a few underlying pain points relating to this topic and provide relevant
examples
as required.

There are two main disadvantages of human connectivity via the internet.
Firstly
, they are open and accessible to everyone
-
even the cyber-criminals, who can
potentially
exploit the vulnerable. For
example
, in India, tens of
people
were lynched
in 2017, due to fake news circulated on
Whatsapp
(a chat app on smart phone). All thanks to these apps, fraudsters can
now
mobilise
crowds and cause harm to the society.
Secondly
, they can expose private information to the public which
otherwise
should stay private. Using this information, lawbreakers can gain access to personal venues such as banking and can withdraw funds. Take an
example
of the recent incident in Singapore, where scammers broke into a bank by using cloned identification cards using information obtained from their customers on Instagram.

On the other hand
, it is all not doom and gloom by using social networks, they can actually be helpful in
many
ways. One such application, for
example
, is in deploying it to
prevent
crime.
For instance
, China polices most of their internet, where they
analyse
patters and identify potential issues
before
they
make
their way to the main stream.
However
, it is
important
to note that despite all these benefits, these venues have far more complicated and sensitive
then
their advantages.

In conclusion
, as
explained
above, it is
clearly
certain that the negatives of social networks outnumber the positives.
Hence
, I
strongly
agree
with the
given
statement and suggest the
people
should be careful about how they
use
these platforms.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a huge negative impact on both society and individuals. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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