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many people believe that music is justa for of entertainment , whilst others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today

many people believe that music is justa for of entertainment, whilst others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today g8rkD
some people believe that music is a common way to chill out, while many people trust that music has a multiple bigger influence on society these day but music play a necessary role model for entertainment in all ages. on the one hand, listening to music is a common form of entertainment at all ages. for example, office worker use headphone to listen music to unwind after work hard. TO listen to music help them temporily forget all the pressure or worried in their daily life and also help them clear their head, recharge their battery. the last one, i am kill for telling you music is the healthiest way to reducestress and feel happier. on the other hand, music is also a way for individuals to feel a connection to differant groups in society. this is more and more true today because the amount of music is growing. in the past, not any singer could sing tons of fascinating song and genre, for the most part of country or folk music and it is really boring and not attract. In the modern world, singers can sing multiple genres such as ( rock, pop and anoher ) even country song can develop. Now and then singer come from poor contries become changing dramatically andaccepting. In conclusion, music is essential for society over the world and music also help open people 's mind to differnt groups in society. it is not the only reason why nowaday people mind open since they take part in and take a keen interst on music band such as (bts, blackpink ) and impact on society.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is a common way to chill out, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
trust that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
has a multiple bigger influence on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
Did you mean "this day" or "these days"?
these day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
play a necessary role model for entertainment in all ages.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the one hand, listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is a common form of entertainment at all ages.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
for
example, office worker
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
headphone to listen
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
to unwind after work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
. TO listen to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
Possible spelling mistake found.
temporily
forget all the pressure or worried in their daily life and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
their head, recharge their battery.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
last one,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
am kill for telling you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is the healthiest way to
Possible spelling mistake found.
reducestress
and feel happier.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
on
the other hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is
also
a way for individuals to feel a connection to
Possible spelling mistake found.
differant
groups in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
is more and more true
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is growing.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
the past, not any singer could sing tons of fascinating song and genre,
for the most part
of country or folk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and it is
really
boring and not attract. In the modern world, singers can sing multiple genres such as
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
rock, pop and
Possible spelling mistake found.
anoher
Don't put a space before the closing parenthesis
)
even country song can develop.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
and then singer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from poor
Possible spelling mistake found.
contries
become changing
dramatically
Possible spelling mistake found.
andaccepting
.
In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
over the world and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
open
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
's mind to
Possible spelling mistake found.
differnt
groups in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
reason why
Possible spelling mistake found.
nowaday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
mind open since they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in and take a keen
Possible spelling mistake found.
interst
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
band such as (
Possible spelling mistake found.
bts
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
blackpink
Don't put a space before the closing parenthesis
)
and impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
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IELTS essay many people believe that music is justa for of entertainment, whilst others believe that music has a much larger impact on society today

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
270 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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