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Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negetive effect on children. To what extent do you agree? v.1

Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negetive effect on children. v. 1
In the past, news about famous people may have been confined to gossip columns in newspapers; these days it is not uncommon for celebrities to feature as front page news. There is evidence that the public feels there is too much news coverage of famous people. Not surprisingly, there is concern about how this might be affecting people, and in particular children. One of the possible negative consequences of the 'cult of celebrity ' is the tendency of confusing fame and notoriety. Celebrity scandals are just as likely to receive publicity as celebrity achievements. Indeed, some famous people have received more attention for their misuse of drugs and alcohol than for their success on the stage or in sports. Children who crave attention may come to see misbehaviour as normal. The emphasis on individuals may also be at the expense of serious news coverage. Next to the superficial excitement of celebrity gossip, news about serious events and issues that have a more profound effect on people’s lives may seem uninteresting. Children may be forming a very distorted picture of how the world works. The negative influence of celebrities on children can also be seen in children’s career aspirations. These days, young people are much more likely to see themselves as potential Sports star's or entertainers. The prevalence of these figures in the mass media may convey the impression that such positions are plentiful. Children may be developing unrealistic expectations that they too will become rich and famous. In summary, the ' cult of celebrities' may be affecting Children in a number of undesirable ways. It is important that children be taught to critically evaluate what they see in the media so that they can form a more realistic view of society, acceptable behaviour, and indeed themselves.
In the past,
news
about
famous
people
may have
been confined
to gossip columns in newspapers; these days it is not uncommon for
celebrities
to feature as front page
news
. There is evidence that the public feels there is too much
news
coverage of
famous
people
. Not
surprisingly
, there is concern about how this might be affecting
people
, and
in particular
children.

One of the possible
negative
consequences of the 'cult of
celebrity
'
is the tendency of confusing fame and notoriety.
Celebrity
scandals are
just
as likely to receive publicity as
celebrity
achievements.
Indeed
,
some
famous
people
have received more attention for their misuse of drugs and alcohol than for their success on the stage or in sports.
Children
who crave attention may
come
to
see
misbehaviour
as normal.

The emphasis on individuals may
also
be at the expense of serious
news
coverage.
Next
to the superficial excitement of
celebrity
gossip,
news
about serious
events
and issues that have a more profound effect on
people’s
lives
may seem uninteresting.
Children
may be forming a
very
distorted picture of how the world works.

The
negative
influence of
celebrities
on
children
can
also
be
seen
in
children’s
career aspirations. These days, young
people
are much more likely to
see
themselves as potential Sports star's or entertainers. The prevalence of these figures in the mass media may convey the impression that such positions are plentiful.
Children
may be developing unrealistic expectations that they too will become rich and
famous
.

In summary, the
'
cult of celebrities' may be affecting
Children
in a number of undesirable ways. It is
important
that
children
be taught
to
critically
evaluate what they
see
in the media
so
that they can form a more realistic view of society, acceptable
behaviour
, and
indeed
themselves.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people believe that media coverage of celebrities is having a negetive effect on children. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
296 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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