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Many people are afraid to leave their homes because of their fear of crime Some people believe that more actions should be taken to prevent crime but others feel that little can be done Discuss both views and give your own opinion v.1

Many people are afraid to leave their homes because of their fear of crime Some people believe that more actions should be taken to prevent crime but others feel that little can be done 1
Air pollution is a huge issue in this modern world. Many people believe that a worldwide vehicle free day can lessen these gloomy atmosphere. Whilst, a number of people claim that there are enormous ways to do that. This essay will discuss either aspect of the reduction process. A cooperative approach towards pollution on the globe would be an optimistic idea. First and foremost, it will encourage people to reduce the uses of diesel or petrol vehicles that produce exhaust fumes. And also, individual's can feel that the effect on weather, which is only created by themselves. For example, if there is no car and conveyance on the road are available, that will make people feel the freshness of the wind. In addition, it can impel some people to use physical transports and so on. These few instances can bolster the existing concept that only one days cohesive program can have a colossal impact on the planet. The government and public should be pragmatic about the actions that will solve the issue. First of all, if the government gives more importance towards highlighting the adverse ramifications of contamination, masses will be more wary of that. Thus, there are also needs to be limiting the consumption of conveyances which is relying on fossil fuels. For instance, most of the masses in Japan rely on bicycle, rickshaw and pedestrian whatsoever, for transporting. Furthermore, the government should make more infrastructure like: bicycle lane, pedestrian etc. However, that would be more convenient for people to use physical transport and lead to environmentally friendly circumstances. In conclusion, this essay discussed that how the poor air quality can be returned into nature. To infer I'm convinced that people are getting more and more aware of these major issues, so, I believe that it will make our ambience reliable in the near future.
Air pollution is a huge issue in this modern world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that a worldwide vehicle free day can lessen these gloomy atmosphere. Whilst, a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that there are enormous ways to do that. This essay will discuss either aspect of the reduction process.

A cooperative approach towards pollution on the globe would be an optimistic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
First
and foremost, it will encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
of diesel or petrol vehicles that produce exhaust fumes. And
also
, individual's can feel that the effect on weather, which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
created by themselves.
For example
, if there is no car and conveyance on the road are available, that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel the freshness of the wind.
In addition
, it can impel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
physical transports and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. These few instances can bolster the existing concept that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Don't use the number 'one' with plural words. Did you mean "one day", "a day", or simply "days"?
one days
cohesive program can have a colossal impact on the planet.

The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and public should be pragmatic about the actions that will solve the issue.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
gives more importance towards highlighting the adverse ramifications of contamination, masses will be more wary of that.
Thus
, there are
also
needs to be limiting the consumption of conveyances which is relying on fossil fuels.
For instance
, most of the masses in Japan rely on bicycle, rickshaw and pedestrian whatsoever, for transporting.
Furthermore
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
more infrastructure like: bicycle lane, pedestrian etc.
However
, that would be more convenient for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
physical transport and lead to
environmentally
friendly circumstances.

In conclusion
, this essay discussed that how the poor air quality can
be returned
into nature. To infer I'm convinced that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are getting more and more aware of these major issues,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, I believe that it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
our ambience reliable in the near future.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people are afraid to leave their homes because of their fear of crime Some people believe that more actions should be taken to prevent crime but others feel that little can be done 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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