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Many parents today organise extra classes for their child after school and at weekends .discuss both the benifits and drawbacks of this approach

Many parents today organise extra classes for their child after school and at weekends. discuss both the benifits and drawbacks of this approach aAPjd
Children are crucial part of our society. Nowadays, every parent tends to send their children to extra classes as they want their pupil to gain more knowledge. This has both benifits and drawbacks which will be discussed in forthcoming paragraph. To begin with, extra classes make students stressed about studies as education is becoming more complex day by day. This means that they have to prepare lesson in advance. In addition, after studying 8 hours in school they have to do after school and then extra classes become a burden on their head. Children will sooner run out of energy as they do not get appropriate rest which causes insidious effects afterwards. In this way students study in fatigue condition. For instance, Banjamin Bradlee chief editor of The Washington Post in his editorial Impact of extra classes on undergraduate published recently in year 2012 in New York illustrate that children need to take proper care of their health by having sufficient time to relax as pupils were having mental illness due to over studying. On the other hand extra classes have gains in same proportion as such classes polish skills of pupils. As we know practice makes a men perfect. Spending time on hobbies enable students to develope their creative and artistic skills such as communication and solving problems. Besides, they can use their spare time on exercise for their better health. For example, nowadays in covid 19 pandemic students used to stay at home in watching tv and movile phones which cause a great loss in studies and health issues. In this case extra classes are must to improve each and every issue either it is related to health or to study. In conclusion, everything has its own pros and pons. In my opinion students must have extra classes but for limited period of time. I believe that children have adequate education at school and rest of the time they should spend to relax or on their hobbies.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
are crucial part of our society. Nowadays, every parent tends to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
as they want their pupil to gain more knowledge. This has both
Possible spelling mistake found.
benifits
and drawbacks which will
be discussed
in forthcoming paragraph.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
about studies as education is becoming more complex day by day. This means that they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
prepare lesson in advance.
In addition
, after studying 8 hours in school they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do after school and then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
become a burden on their head.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
will sooner run out of energy as they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
appropriate rest which causes insidious effects afterwards. In this way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
study in fatigue condition.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Banjamin
Possible spelling mistake found.
Bradlee
chief editor of The Washington Post in his editorial Impact of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
on undergraduate published recently in year 2012 in New York illustrate that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
need to take proper care of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
by having sufficient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to relax as pupils were having mental illness due to over studying.

On the other hand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
have gains in same proportion as such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
polish
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
of pupils.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
we know practice
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
perfect. Spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on hobbies enable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
develope
their creative and artistic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
such as communication and solving problems.
Besides
, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their spare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on exercise for their better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
.
For example
, nowadays in
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid 19
pandemic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to stay at home in watching
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
movile
phones which cause a great loss in studies and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
issues.
In this case
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
are
After 'must', the verb is used without 'to'. Probably, you should use "must" or "have to" here.
must to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
each and every issue either it
is related
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
or to study.

In conclusion
, everything has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
pros and
Possible spelling mistake found.
pons
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
my opinion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
classes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for limited period of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have adequate education at school and rest of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
they should spend to relax or on their hobbies.
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IELTS essay Many parents today organise extra classes for their child after school and at weekends. discuss both the benifits and drawbacks of this approach

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
329 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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