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Many offendres commit more crimes after serving the first punishment, why this is happening and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem v.2

Many offendres commit more crimes after serving the first punishment, why this is happening and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem v. 2
It is unquestionable that criminals commit more crimes after releasing first time from prisons. While there are various reasons for this trend, some effective measure can be taken by governments to tackle this situation. The most obvious reason of reoffending is that prisoners meet each other when they locked up. They share their experiences and how they committed the crime because of this they learn new procedures and different techniques to commit the illegal act. For instance, a study have been shown that people can easily inspire from the surroundings thus when criminal come first time in prison, they try to mimic or learn from dangerous prisoners. Another noticeable reason is that when offenders release from prison, they would have difficulty to obtain employment due to bad criminal record or lack of the education and skills. To tackle this issue, government should take a initiatives. They could arrange special rehabilitation programs in prison in order to teach them valuable skills including basic computers training, or they can offer some diploma programs such as how to maintain the cars and graphic designing. They could also introduce health related programs such as how to manage the stress level or how to control the anger. Furthermore, prisons should have some rules and regulation about dangerous criminal, they could have separate place from first time offenders. Community service is another way to reform offenders, rather than they locked up in prison, they should have opportunity to meet people in community and serve them, this trend will eliminate the negative influence prisoner would have. In conclusion, reoffender is one of the major problem in our society, but it can be tackled by introducing the rehabilitation and community services.
It is unquestionable that
criminals
commit more crimes after releasing
first
time from
prisons
. While there are various reasons for this trend,
some
effective measure can
be taken
by
governments
to tackle this situation.

The most obvious reason of
reoffending
is that prisoners
meet
each other when they locked up. They share their experiences and how they committed the crime
because of this
they learn new procedures and
different
techniques to commit the illegal act.
For instance
, a study have
been shown
that
people
can
easily
inspire from the surroundings
thus
when
criminal
come
first
time in
prison
, they try to mimic or learn from
dangerous
prisoners. Another noticeable reason is that when offenders release from
prison
, they would have difficulty to obtain employment due to
bad
criminal
record or lack of the education and
skills
.

To tackle this issue,
government
should take
a initiatives
. They could arrange special rehabilitation programs in
prison
in order to teach them valuable
skills
including basic computers training, or they can offer
some
diploma programs such as how to maintain the cars and graphic designing. They could
also
introduce health related programs such as how to manage the
stress
level or how to control the anger.
Furthermore
,
prisons
should have
some
rules
and regulation about
dangerous
criminal
, they could have separate place from
first
time offenders. Community service is another way to reform offenders,
rather
than they locked up in
prison
, they should have opportunity to
meet
people
in community and serve them, this trend will eliminate the
negative
influence prisoner would have.

In conclusion
,
reoffender
is one of the major problem in our society,
but
it can
be tackled
by introducing the rehabilitation and community services.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Many offendres commit more crimes after serving the first punishment, why this is happening and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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