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Many criminals commit crimes as soon as they released from prison. What do you think are the causes of this? What possible solutions can you suggest? v.1

Many criminals commit crimes as soon as they released from prison. What do you think are the causes of this? What possible solutions can you suggest? v. 1
It is often seen that several offenders engage in offences again after they get free from jail. In my opinion, the major cause of this is unemployment; however; this problem can be solved by taking appropriate initiatives by law enforcers. Lack of employment opportunities in society for the evildoers is one of the main reasons for them to become associated with criminal activities again. This is because the mischiefs naturally create a negative impression among the people for their notorious acts; therefore, while they return to society after consumption of penalties, the inhabitants do not take them into their accounts like the others. In most of the cases, they are treated not only with fear but also abhor. As a result, these returned people face obstacles to find out employment for them. As a result, they chose their past life to manage their bread and butter. For instance, the daily newspaper Times recently published that more than 50% of the offenders re-offend because of not getting any job in their community. This situation could be ameliorated by the government by introducing a rehabilitation program for the criminals. To facilitate the program, several tasks could be included with it, such as vocational training, motivational speeches, recreational activities, and job placement. Engaging prisoners with this kind of tasks might create a sense in them to live with respect in society, which will deter them to do unlawful work in the future. For example, in Bangladesh re-offending has reduced drastically after inaugurating a vast hands-on training project for the convicts by the policemen. In conclusion, few work opportunities are the crucial cause behind the associating in crimes again after a prison sentence. Nevertheless, the government could tackle this issue by commencing a development program for them.
It is
often
seen
that several offenders engage in
offences
again after they
get
free from jail. In my opinion, the major cause of this is unemployment;
however
; this problem can
be solved
by taking appropriate initiatives by law enforcers.

Lack of employment opportunities in society for the evildoers is one of the main reasons for them to become associated with criminal activities again. This is
because
the
mischiefs
naturally
create a
negative
impression among the
people
for their notorious acts;
therefore
, while they return to society after consumption of penalties, the inhabitants do not take them into their accounts like the others. In most of the cases, they
are treated
not
only
with fear
but
also
abhor.
As a result
, these returned
people
face obstacles to find out employment for them.
As a result
, they chose their past life to manage their bread and butter.
For instance
, the daily newspaper Times recently published that more than 50% of the offenders re-offend
because
of not getting any job in their community.

This situation could
be ameliorated
by the
government
by introducing a rehabilitation program for the criminals. To facilitate the program, several tasks could
be included
with it, such as vocational training, motivational speeches, recreational activities, and job placement. Engaging prisoners with this kind of tasks might create a sense in them to
live
with respect in society, which will deter them to do unlawful work in the future.
For example
, in Bangladesh re-offending has
reduced
drastically
after inaugurating a vast hands-on training project for the convicts by the policemen.

In conclusion
, few work opportunities are the crucial cause behind the associating in crimes again after a prison sentence.
Nevertheless
, the
government
could tackle this issue by commencing a development program for them.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay Many criminals commit crimes as soon as they released from prison. What do you think are the causes of this? What possible solutions can you suggest? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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