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Many countries now provide free healthcare. However, more people believe that people with unhealthy habits, like smoking and drinking should not get this device free of charge. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many countries now provide free healthcare. However, more people believe that people with unhealthy habits, like smoking and drinking should not get this device free of charge. o5el9
In this day and age, people do not need to pay money for healthcare in some countries. However, it is claimed that this service should not be provided for smokers or alcoholics. From my point of view, I agree with this statement for these following reasons. To begin with, society will gain some benefits if people with unhealthy habits are not allowed to use the device. First and foremost, there will be a reduction in the number of smokers. In particular, free healthcare for everyone may promote the rate of smokers, as they have no fear of cost of treatment for diseases relating to heart or lungs they may have to suffer from. Therefore, if this device is limited and only for people with healthy lifestyles, it will force people to give up some bad habits. Second, smoke from cigarettes contributes to air pollution, which makes people find it difficult to breathe in fresh air. Also, this has a bad effect on the environment. Furthermore, governments can encourage people to have healthy lives if all types of people do not use the device. To be more specific, this will help raise people’s awareness of the importance of good health. People who care about their health should deserve free healthcare, while some people choose to destroy their health; thus, they must accept some serious diseases and have to pay for the treatment. Moreover, cigarettes and wines are not only harmful for users but also for children and women around them. They will have a chance to live in a better environment on condition that there is a decrease in the number of smokers and alcoholics. In conclusion, I believe that only people with unsuitable lifestyles are forbidden to use free healthcare. In addition, if this can be applied, society and people can take advantage of it.
In this day and age,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not need to pay money for healthcare in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries.
However
, it
is claimed
that this service should not
be provided
for smokers or alcoholics. From my point of view, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement for these following reasons.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, society will gain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with unhealthy habits are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the device.
First
and foremost, there will be a reduction in the number of smokers.
In particular
, free healthcare for everyone may promote the rate of smokers, as they have no fear of cost of treatment for diseases relating to heart or lungs they may
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
suffer from.
Therefore
, if this device
is limited
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with healthy lifestyles, it will force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to give up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habits. Second, smoke from cigarettes contributes to air pollution, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
find it difficult to breathe in fresh air.
Also
, this has a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effect on the environment.

Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
can encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have healthy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
if all types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the device. To be more specific, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
raise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
awareness of the importance of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who care about their health should deserve free healthcare, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
choose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
their health;
thus
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
accept
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious diseases and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay for the treatment.
Moreover
, cigarettes and wines are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
harmful for users
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for children and women around them. They will have a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a better environment on condition that there is a decrease in the number of smokers and alcoholics.

In conclusion
, I believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with unsuitable lifestyles
are forbidden
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
free healthcare.
In addition
, if this can
be applied
, society and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can take advantage of it.
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IELTS essay Many countries now provide free healthcare. However, more people believe that people with unhealthy habits, like smoking and drinking should not get this device free of charge.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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