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Many countries aim to improve their standard of living through economic development. Sometimes this may bring loss of social value as a result. Do advantage of higher standard of living outweigh it's disadvantage

Many countries aim to improve their standard of living through economic development. Sometimes this may bring loss of social value as a result. Do advantage of higher standard of living outweigh it's disadvantage leV09
Economic development is essential for any country because the economic conditions of a contry will leave a very heavy impact on the daily routine of the citizens of that country. The economic development is directly linked to the better living standard of the people of the country If any country wants to provide a better living standard to the citizen and wants to provide essential needs of living to every citizen
Economic development is essential for any
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country
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because
the economic conditions of a
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contry
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
heavy impact on the daily routine of the citizens of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. The economic development is
directly
linked to the better living standard of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
If any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
wants to provide a better living standard to the citizen and wants to provide essential needs of living to every
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
citizen

IELTS essay Many countries aim to improve their standard of living through economic development. Sometimes this may bring loss of social value as a result. Do advantage of higher standard of living outweigh it's disadvantage

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
70 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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