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Some companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Many companies sponsor sports as a way of advertising themselves. Some people think that it is a good thing, while others think that it has disadvantages. 7
Certain companies advertise themselves by sponsoring sports. Few people believe it is good, while others assume there are disadvantages to this. However, I believe that positives outweigh the negatives. To begin with, Sports are widely followed by numerous people. Companies sponsoring them may really improve their reputation all the world. For example, Gatorade's sales accelerate when they are sponsored in the American football teams and events. Moreover, Sports team gain money from these sponsors, as a result sport teams may use the money to improve their facilities as well as provide more coaching. Moreover, having sponsorships motivate athletes to focus more in their training and production of their sports. In fact, it is reported that some athletes compete quite better when they get sponsored by some companies. Companies tend to focus more in sponsoring sports because they find sports most reliable way to advertise themselves nowadays. On the other side, Sponsoring sports have multiple negatives. Firstly, sport's reputation decreases gradually when several companies sponsor sports; they make people think that sports are used for business only. Interest on sports in people will decrease when they see companies sponsoring them. Companies pay billions of dollars to sponsor sports, which is quite expensive. Besides, governing sports will rely on sponsoring only and will not focus on their achievements. To sum up, in my view, sponsoring sports are generally considered cost beneficial as companies can introduce their business to the number of viewers. However, sponsoring must be done to some extent and sports should accept certain type of companies which the sports would benefit them too.
Certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
advertise themselves by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. Few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
, while others assume there are disadvantages to this.
However
, I believe that positives outweigh the negatives.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
are
widely
followed by numerous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Companies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
them may
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their reputation all the world.
For example
, Gatorade's sales accelerate when they
are sponsored
in the American football teams and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
team gain money from these sponsors,
as a result
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
teams may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their facilities
as well
as provide more coaching.

Two successive sentences begin with the same adverb. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
Moreover
, having sponsorships motivate athletes to focus more in their training and production of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. In fact, it
is reported
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
athletes compete quite better when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
sponsored by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Companies
tend to focus more in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
most reliable way to advertise themselves nowadays.

On the other side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sponsoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have multiple negatives.
Firstly
, sport's reputation decreases
gradually
when several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
sponsor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
; they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for business
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
. Interest on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will decrease when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
them.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Companies
pay billions of dollars to sponsor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, which is quite expensive.
Besides
, governing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
will rely on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
and will not focus on their achievements.

To sum up, in my view,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are
generally
considered cost beneficial as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
can introduce their business to the number of viewers.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sponsoring
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be done
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
should accept certain type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
companies
which the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
would benefit them too.
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Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay Some companies sponsor sports as a way to advertise themselves. Some people think it is good, while others think there are disadvantages to this.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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