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Lots of people are throwing away food. What are the reasons for this and how can food wastage be reduced? v.2

Lots of people are throwing away food. What are the reasons for this and how can food wastage be reduced? v. 2
Over the years, with the development of new technologies, many people are not concerned about the wastage of food. Despite knowing that wasting the food is consuming the resources more, people tend to throw the food without even considering the future impacts. In this essay, the reasons for throwing the food and solutions for this are explained in the following paragraphs. To commence with, primarily, the reason behind the wastage of food is purchased or preparing food too much. In other words, it's obvious that the excess food on the plate will go waste. Furthermore, nobody wants to have excess than the need of their body. For example, during the parties or such events, people prepare the food more than needed and eventually the prepared food will be thrown in the garbage. Consequently, prepared food will go waste. However, considering the problem, there is a solution for it. First of all, the organizers of any events or parties should perfectly estimate the number of people coming to eat. Similarly, people should not buy food haphazardly, in fact, they should be concerned about the number of people eating it. In this way, the wastage of food can be reduced. In conclusion, food wastage is one of the huge problems of the modern generation. However, this can be somewhat reduced by analysing the number of people consuming it systematically.
Over the years, with the development of new technologies,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not concerned about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. Despite knowing that wasting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is consuming the resources more,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to throw the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
without even considering the future impacts. In this essay, the reasons for throwing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and solutions for this are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
in the following paragraphs.

To commence with,
primarily
, the reason behind the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
or preparing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
too much.
In other words
, it's obvious that the excess
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
on the plate will go waste.
Furthermore
, nobody wants to have
Use "(excess)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
excess
than the need of their body.
For example
, during the parties or such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prepare the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
more than needed and
eventually
the prepared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
will
be thrown
in the garbage.
Consequently
, prepared
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
will go waste.

However
, considering the problem, there is a solution for it.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the organizers of any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
or parties should
perfectly
estimate the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
coming to eat.
Similarly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
haphazardly
, in fact, they should
be concerned
about the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
eating it. In this way, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wastage
is one of the huge problems of the modern generation.
However
, this can be somewhat
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
by
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysing' is British English.
analysing
the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consuming it
systematically
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay Lots of people are throwing away food. What are the reasons for this and how can food wastage be reduced? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
227 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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