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Living in an apartment instead of a university dormitory has advantages and disadvantages. v.3

Living in an apartment instead of a university dormitory has advantages and disadvantages. v. 3
After getting admitted to a university, a student needs to decide where to live and this choice severely affects his academic performance and student life. While most universities offer residence facility for students, many opt to live in an apartment and this has both benefits and demerits. This essay probe the advantages and disadvantages of living in a separate apartment than living in the university provided residential houses. Living in an apartment offers many distinct advantages and the privacy is one of them. While a university dormitory is shared by several students, someone living in an apartment enjoys far more freedom and privacy than the students living in dormitories. He can choose a quiet neighbourhood and this environment is conducive for studying attentively. Furthermore, living in an apartment makes students more independent and they can choose a more healthy diet. Finally, apartments are tidier than the dormitory and pupils can stay away from bad influences. For instance, one of my cousins had to move to an apartment after living in a university dormitory for about six months and his main reason for the shift was cleanliness. Having said that, there are some visible disadvantages of living in a flat rather than living in a university residence hall. First and foremost is the cost. In my country living in an apartment is quite expensive while university offers cheap accommodation. The food on the university campus is also cheaper while this is not the case when a student lives in a flat away from the university. Second, renting an apartment in my city is hard for a student. The landlords prefer families over the students. Furthermore, the daily commuting is convenient from the university halls while not so easy from the apartments away from the university campus. Last but not the least, campus staying students have better interaction with seniors and teachers. Even though there are many advantages of living in an apartment, I would prefer to live in the university dormitory. The first and foremost reason for me to be able to attend my classes without commuting through bad traffic. I hate to wait in the heavy traffic and as I do not own a car. I would also like to enjoy my university life and stay in touch with my seniors, teachers and classmates whenever possible. The university life has so many things to offer and I do not want to miss them.
After getting admitted to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
needs to decide where to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
and this choice
severely
affects his academic performance and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
life. While most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offer
residence facility for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
opt to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
and this has both benefits and demerits. This essay probe the advantages and disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a separate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
provided residential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
.

Living in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
distinct advantages and the privacy is one of them. While a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
is shared
by several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, someone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
enjoys far more freedom and privacy than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitories
. He can choose a quiet
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbourhood' is British English.
neighbourhood
and this environment is conducive for studying
attentively
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
more
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
independent and
they can choose a more healthy diet.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartments
are tidier than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
and pupils can stay away from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
influences.
For instance
, one of my cousins had to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
for about six months and his main reason for the shift was cleanliness.

Having said that, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
visible disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a flat
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
residence hall.
First
and foremost is the cost. In my country
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
is quite expensive while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
accommodation. The food on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
campus is
also
cheaper while this is not the case when a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
in a flat away from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. Second, renting an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
in my city is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
. The landlords prefer families over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Furthermore
, the daily commuting is convenient from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
halls while not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
easy from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartments
away from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
campus. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not the least, campus staying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
have better interaction with seniors and teachers.

Even though
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apartment
, I would prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dormitory
. The
first
and foremost reason for me to be able to attend my classes without commuting through
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
traffic. I hate to wait in the heavy traffic and as I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
a car. I would
also
like to enjoy my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
life and stay in touch with my seniors, teachers and classmates whenever possible. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
life has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offer
and I do not want to miss them.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
58Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Living in an apartment instead of a university dormitory has advantages and disadvantages. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
403 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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