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leaving their own poorer countries

leaving their own poorer countries r17M6
It is true that a great deal of experts from various walks of life like health practitioners, mentors with educational backgrounds travel to the advanced nations from their native underdeveloped countries. This essay shall discuss two main problems including decreased working capacity and rising cost and also discuss two primary solutions including high salary offers and limitations by the policy makers. On the one hand, this phenomenon is a major cause of the brain drain from the country. In other words, a myriad of highly qualified personnels leave their homes to find better opportunities, in terms of wages and privileges due to which a country suffers from lack of the potential workers from every discipline. This definitely results in reduced labour force in the market. Another obvious problem is the upsurge in prices of services provided by such professionals. For instance, patients have to pay a huge amount of money for the medical examination fee in Pakistan owing to less number of available trained physicians. Therefore, it can be argued that, less number of work force and inflation are the imminent threats that need to be addressed on a war footing. Despite the above mentioned problems, several effective steps can be taken to resolve this issue. In the first place, increasing remuneration and arranging better facilities is the best way to lure the elite class to both remain and serve within the community. Another possible measure is the ban on travel of qualified citizens by the government. In this way, the authorities can not only control the exit, but also make them sign a contract of serving for a specified period of time. For instance, in Japan, it is compulsory for graduates to do jobs in their designated disciplines for at least two years. Thus, these are the ways which can be introduced to make individuals work for their own nations first. In conclusion, while there are numerous negative aspects of immigration to rich third world countries, large scale, long term interventions are required to mitigate this problem.
It is true that a great deal of experts from various walks of life like health practitioners, mentors with educational backgrounds travel to the advanced nations from their native underdeveloped
countries
. This essay shall discuss two main
problems
including decreased working capacity and rising cost and
also
discuss two primary solutions including high salary offers and limitations by the
policy makers
.

On the one hand, this phenomenon is a major cause of the brain drain from the
country
.
In other words
, a myriad of
highly
qualified
personnels
leave
their homes to find better opportunities, in terms of wages and privileges due to which a
country
suffers from lack of the potential workers from every discipline. This definitely results in
reduced
labour
force in the market. Another obvious
problem
is the upsurge in prices of services provided by such professionals.
For instance
, patients
have to
pay a huge amount of money for the medical examination fee in Pakistan owing to less number of available trained physicians.
Therefore
, it can
be argued
that, less number of work force and inflation are the imminent threats that need to
be addressed
on a war footing.

Despite the above mentioned
problems
, several effective steps can
be taken
to resolve this issue. In the
first
place, increasing remuneration and arranging better facilities is the best way to lure the elite
class
to both remain and serve within the community. Another possible measure is the ban on travel of qualified citizens by the
government
. In this way, the authorities can not
only
control the exit,
but
also
make
them
sign
a contract of serving for a specified period of time.
For instance
, in Japan, it is compulsory for graduates to do jobs in their designated disciplines for at least two years.
Thus
, these are the ways which can
be introduced
to
make
individuals work for their
own
nations
first
.

In conclusion
, while there are numerous
negative
aspects of immigration to rich third world
countries
, large scale, long term interventions
are required
to mitigate this
problem
.
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IELTS essay leaving their own poorer countries

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
338 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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