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Leaving longer and life expectancy is increasing day you think advantages of this development out with disadvantages

Leaving longer and life expectancy is increasing day you think advantages of this development out with disadvantages B78E5
It is true that average life expectancy has increased significantly because of of the advances made in the field of medical science in my opinion this is a positive development however it also means that more resources are required for talking care of the elders peoples. Longer life expectancy does not mean that a person will remain healthy throughout their life older people need medical facilities in nursing care and they have more number of days for year 20 mins Government and societies need more doctors nursing staff healthcare facilities in addition with the increasing number of old age retired people the government spending on pension schemes and other welfare service will also increases on the other hand morooda people all song in slow attacks generate this issue will indirectly work done or affected on the working younger generation interesting life expectancy also has many advantages to the individuals their families and the government for the benefit of this is that people can live longer with their families and friends and travel to various places they also contribute to the society secondly that families and societies also get benefits of their experiences they can give valuable advice and emotional with health support to younger generation in the difficult times they also take care of their grandchildren and teach then various life skills moral and cultural values to conclude all the life expectancy is a blessing it is not without disadvantage is life expectancy out wages its drawbacks as improvement in the medical care system in the country for the I believe that people should improve their lifestyle and lead a healthy life.
It is true that average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
expectancy has increased
significantly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Possible typo: you repeated a word
of of
the advances made in the field of medical science in my opinion this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development
however
it
also
means that more resources
are required
for talking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of the elders
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
. Longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
expectancy does not mean that a person will remain healthy throughout their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need medical facilities in nursing
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
care and
they have more number of days for year 20
Possible spelling mistake found.
mins
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
and societies need more doctors nursing staff healthcare facilities
in addition
with the increasing number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
age retired
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
spending on pension schemes and other welfare service will
also
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "increase"
increases
on the other hand
Possible spelling mistake found.
morooda
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
all song in slow attacks generate this issue will
indirectly
work done or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
on the working younger generation interesting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
expectancy
also
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages to the individuals their families and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
for the benefit of this is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
longer with their families and friends and travel to various places they
also
contribute to the society
secondly
that families and societies
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
benefits of their experiences they can give valuable advice and emotional with health support to younger generation in the difficult times they
also
take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of their grandchildren and teach then various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
moral and cultural values
to conclude
all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
expectancy is a blessing it is not without disadvantage is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
expectancy out wages its drawbacks as improvement in the medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
system in the country for
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "I"?
the I
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their lifestyle and lead a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
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IELTS essay Leaving longer and life expectancy is increasing day you think advantages of this development out with disadvantages

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
272 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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