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Learning about the past has no value for those of us living in the present. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.2

Learning about the past has no value for those of us living in the present. v. 2
In the present, people are living in modern life-style and upgrade with new generation or new trends. That our new youth has believes the history his not important to live in that current time. Also, in the past the many situation was created but the young people has not accepted those things. If asked to support, I practically believe that statement and will elaborated further. Generally, our youth are most of information that they do not trust to work in the futures because they have not aware and its also believes in the present situation. Moreover, in the past all mankind has unexpectable experience that wok on the future. For instance, student had to study in their life but some time they have to feel it is worthy. Furthermore, in the school life they had to study about the basic knowledge of they have to study in futures also its not worthy for them. Thus, the past learning is more important to new people. On the other hand, some time they are right about past think to not value in future; However, past learning is worthy for present people. Additionally, current generation believe in change with new trends and life-style. For example, In the past time people are communicating with latter and birds but in the recent time young people accept the new technology that is batter for communication. So, the past is not perfect for the today’s human. To conclude, most of people are not accept history but some cases they have to believe and some other type on they can not trust in past learning because they habited to the new orientation. In this my opinion, both situations are important for these days.
In the present,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are living in modern life-style and upgrade with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
generation or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
trends. That our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
youth has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believes
the history his not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
Also
, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
the
Possible agreement error. The noun situation seems to be countable; consider using: "many situations".
many situation
was created
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
has
not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
those things. If asked to support, I
practically
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that statement and will elaborated
further
.

Generally
, our youth are
Consider using "most information" or "most of the information".
most of information
that they do not trust to work in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
futures
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have not aware and its
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believes
in the present situation.
Moreover
, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
all mankind has
Possible spelling mistake found.
unexpectable
experience that wok on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
For instance
, student had to study in their life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
feel it is worthy.
Furthermore
, in the school life they had to study about the basic knowledge of they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
study in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
futures
also
its not worthy for them.
Thus
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
learning is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
they are right about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
to not value in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
;
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
learning is worthy for present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Additionally
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
generation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
trends and life-style.
For example
, In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are communicating with latter and birds
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
accept the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
technology
that is
batter for communication.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
is not perfect for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s human.

To conclude
, most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not accept history
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other type on they can not trust in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
learning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
habited
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
orientation. In this my opinion, both situations are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for these days.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
35Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Learning about the past has no value for those of us living in the present. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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