Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Le some people think that earning money is the only factor due to which people do work.to what extend do you agree?

Le some people think that earning money is the only factor due to which people do work. 250bA
Several people opine that people do jobs and works just to receive salary. I agree with this statement because money is the basic aim of evrry work or job. To initiate with, without money no work is possible. People will not do work if they will not be offered or paid money. We can make every work possible within minutes by just showing money. It meets the daily demands of an individual. So, it also works as a livelihood for them. For instance, In Japan, people are given the working hours to do jobs or work. If, they are willing to do over-time work, they can and for that they will be paid extra amount or charges. This enhance the curiosity level of the workers in work. Further strengthening the same point of view, In foreign countries, the work is done in many shifts with some regular breaks. So, that the study or other works may not get interrupted. They work hard to earn money. The most important thing is that money brings happiness to our faces. Any person whether he is rich or poor, cannot buy happiness. Moreover, the growing era is the era of costliness. So, to purchase or buy items or things, one must have money in his hands. Thats why people do work to receive money. It also works as a bridge to achieve success. To recaptulate, with money one can live a happy and healthy life. It leads to the better life. It can be a solution to many problems. So, money is the most important characterstic of living a cheerful life. If people do not work, they will be unempoyed and they will not be able to buy anything of their choice.
Several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do jobs and works
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
to receive salary. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is the basic aim of
Possible spelling mistake found.
evrry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or job.

To initiate with, without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is possible.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
will not do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
if they will not
be offered
or paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
possible within minutes by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
showing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. It meets the daily demands of an individual.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it
also
works as a livelihood for them.
For instance
, In Japan,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the working hours to do jobs or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. If, they are willing to do over-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, they can and for that they will
be paid
extra amount or charges.
The verb 'enhance' is plural. Did you mean: "This enhances"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
This enhance
the curiosity level of the workers in work.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Further
strengthening the same point of view, In foreign countries, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is done
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
shifts with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
regular breaks.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, that the study or other works may not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
interrupted. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to earn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. The most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
brings happiness to our faces. Any person whether he is rich or poor, cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
happiness.
Moreover
, the growing era is the era of costliness.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
items or things, one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
in his hands.
Possible spelling mistake found
Thats
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
to receive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
. It
also
works as a bridge to achieve success.

To
Possible spelling mistake found.
recaptulate
, with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
one can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a happy and healthy life. It leads to the better life. It can be a solution to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
Possible spelling mistake found.
characterstic
of living a cheerful life. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, they will be
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
unempoyed and
they will not be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
anything of their choice.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Le some people think that earning money is the only factor due to which people do work.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Le some people think that earning money is the only factor due to which people do work.to what extend do you agree?