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Law can change human behavior, do you agree or not? Some people believe, law changes human behavior. Do you agree or disagree?

Law can change human behavior, do you agree or not? Some people believe, law changes human behavior. 7WK1A
Recently, many laws have been strictly enforced by the government in order to decrease the crime ratio at a considerable rate. Certain laws that have been passed on the bill have started making minorCHANGES along with some major changes worldwide. This act has made some people believe that strict law enforcement can really change human behavior. Debatable controversies on this will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs. First, and foremost, at the outset, there are diverse approaches to why this subject is considered momentous, but the most conspicuous one stands from the occurrence that strict law enforcement along with the penalty to the one who has committed crime, makes the next person to commit the same crime withdraw himself from doing so. Also, some people who have their identities in the political world, due to the economic powers, fear nothing, bluntly commits the crime, blames on the(ON IS NOT NEEDED) victim and gets bailed. This situation by strict law enforcement haveHAS improved and no such political power is now applicable to flee from a crime committed. On the other hand, the most significant facet of this argument is that proper justice is given to the victim and taking this under consideration, other people who find it embarrassing to file a complaint against the crime, might gain the strength to file a complaint and get justice served to themselves. Due to this, the person committing the crime would fear that he might get caught and penalized, turning him to drop the idea of committing the offence. In conclusion, taking into the considerations THE IS NOT NEEDED the facts coupled with the circumstances, I firmly believe that strong law enforcement can definitely changeTHE IS NOT NEEDED the human behavior.
Recently,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
have been
strictly
enforced by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
in order to

decrease the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
ratio at a considerable rate. Certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
that have
been passed
on the bill have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
making
Possible spelling mistake found.
minorCHANGES
along with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
major

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
worldwide. This act has made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that strict law

enforcement can
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
human behavior. Debatable controversies on this

will
be discussed
in the upcoming paragraphs.

First
, and foremost, at the outset, there are diverse approaches to why this

subject
is considered
momentous,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the most conspicuous one stands from the

occurrence that strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
enforcement along with the penalty to the one who has

committed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the
next
person to commit the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
withdraw

himself from doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
.
Also
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who have their identities in the political

world, due to the economic powers, fear nothing,
bluntly
commits the crime,

blames on the(ON IS NOT NEEDED) victim and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
bailed. This situation by strict

law enforcement
Possible spelling mistake found.
haveHAS
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
and no such political power is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now


applicable to flee from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
committed.

On the other hand
, the most significant facet of this argument is that proper

justice is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to the victim and taking this under consideration, other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people


who find it embarrassing to file a complaint against the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, might gain the

strength to file a complaint and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
justice served to themselves. Due to this, the

person committing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
would fear that he might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
caught and penalized,

turning him to drop the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of committing the
Possible spelling mistake. 'offence' is British English.
offence
.

In conclusion
, taking into the considerations THE IS NOT NEEDED the facts

coupled with the circumstances, I
firmly
believe that strong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
enforcement can

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
definitely
Possible spelling mistake found.
changeTHE
IS NOT NEEDED the human behavior.

IELTS essay Law can change human behavior, do you agree or not? Some people believe, law changes human behavior.

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
287 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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