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Lack of fresh water is becoming a global issue of increasing importance. What problems does this shortage cause? What measures could be taken to overcome these problems? v.5

Problems related to the shortage of resources is an issue that is increasing over the years around the world. The past few years, the lack of water available to the human consumption is decreasing highly, which is a huge problem to the humanity because water is the main resource that maintain us alive. If this situation does not change rapidly, this will provoke several problems to people, as the reduction of water able to consume, that will lead us to limit the amount of water allowed for individual. Also, this would cause the reduction of fruits, vegetables and legumes that are produced mainly with water, causing that the amount of food will be also limited by person. These are only a few issues that I can mention briefly, because the lack of fresh water is a huge problem that generates an uncountable number of consequences in the human and animal life. Nevertheless, the population is still in time to devise solutions to this issue that affects and should concern to everyone, because in most of the countries of the world, fresh water is still available to people unlimitedly. Principally, and among a lot of possible solutions, I believe people ought to care about the amount of water they utilise to unnecessary things, for example, washing the car or washing the dishes. I do not mean to say that people should not clean their items, however, most people use an insanely amount of water to do these chores, when easily they could do the same with less fresh water. For instance, my father, who still does not take any measures to take care of the planet and our resources, wash his hands and teeth with a lot of the water running, and every time I see him, I have to turn off the tap for him. In conclusion, people must be conscious about this problem and take measures to tackle it, because if everyone did a tiny action to help to protect our water, the situation at the present time would be completely different.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Problems
related to the shortage of resources is an issue
that is
increasing over the years around the world. The past few years, the lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
available to the human consumption is decreasing
highly
, which is a huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
to the humanity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is the main resource that maintain us alive.

If this situation does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
rapidly
, this will provoke several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, as the reduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
able to consume, that will lead us to limit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
for individual.
Also
, this would cause the reduction of fruits, vegetables and legumes that
are produced
mainly
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
, causing that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of food will be
also
limited by person. These are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few issues that I can mention
briefly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the lack of fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is a huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
that generates an uncountable number of consequences in the human and animal life.

Nevertheless
, the population is
still
in time to devise solutions to this issue that affects and should concern to everyone,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
in most of the countries of the world, fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
is
still
available to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
unlimitedly
.
Principally
, and among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
possible solutions, I believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
ought to care about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
they
Possible spelling mistake. ‘utilise’ is British English.
utilise
to unnecessary things,
for example
, washing the car or washing the dishes. I do not mean to say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should not clean their items,
however
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
an
insanely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
to do these chores, when
easily
they could do the same with less fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
.
For instance
, my father, who
still
does not take any measures to take care of the planet and our resources, wash his hands and teeth with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
running, and every time I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
him, I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
turn off the tap for him.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be conscious about this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
and take measures to tackle it,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if everyone did a tiny action to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to protect our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
, the situation at the present time would be completely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
.
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IELTS essay : Lack of fresh water is becoming a global issue of increasing importance. What problems does this shortage cause? What measures could be taken to overcome these problems?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
343 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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