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Junk food TV adverts to be banned before 9pm To what extent do you agree with this action/rule?

Junk food TV adverts to be banned before 9pm OwVOE
I agree with the action that junk food TV adverts should beto be banned before 9pm. This topic has both good and bad points. Now I will write why I agree. Someone who disagrees with junk food TV adverts to be banned before 9pm have opinions. Food companies are confusing this action, because they can't use TV to sell their food stuff after 9pm. That means food companies can't make benefits like normal if they accept this action. That is not happy for them. In addition, if junk food TV adverts to be banned, customers can buy food, so this action has not had good effects. This action is going to have bad effects for food companies. Others who agree with junk food TV adverts to be banned before 9 am including me. We also have opinions why we agree. Overweight population is still increasing around the world. COVID-19 is one of the keys to increasing overweight. Example in the UK, more than 60% of the adult population is now overweight. This is bad for them. Reasons why being overweight is not good for them. Overweight interferes with the healing of the disease. That means it is not good for your health. It has bad effects for COVID-19, flu and all of that type of stuff. This is connected to losing your life. I don't want that, so I agree with this action. As a result, I agree with the action that junk food TV adverts to be banned before 9pm, but I understand food companies' feelings, so I suggest telling them how being overweight gives us bad effects first.
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agree
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
TV adverts should
Possible spelling mistake found.
beto
be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
9pm. This topic has both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
points.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
I will write why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
.

Someone who disagrees with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
TV adverts to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
9pm have opinions.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
are confusing this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
TV to sell their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
stuff after 9pm. That means
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
can't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
benefits like normal if they accept this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
.
That is
not happy for them.
In addition
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
TV adverts to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banned
, customers can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
has not had
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
effects. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
is going to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
effects for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

Others who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agree
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
TV adverts to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
9 am including me. We
also
have opinions why we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agree
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Overweight
population is
still
increasing around the world. COVID-19 is one of the keys to increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overweight
. Example in the UK, more than 60% of the adult population is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overweight
. This is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
for them. Reasons why being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overweight
is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
for them.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Overweight
interferes with the healing of the disease. That means it is not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
for your health. It has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
effects for COVID-19, flu and all of that type of stuff. This
is connected
to losing your life. I don't want that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agree
with this action.

As a result
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
agree
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
action
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
TV adverts to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
banned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
before
9pm,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I understand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
' feelings,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I suggest telling them how being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overweight
gives us
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
effects
first
.
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IELTS essay Junk food TV adverts to be banned before 9pm

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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