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Job satisfaction or job security which one is more important.

Job satisfaction or job security which one is more important. NykG0
Some people think that job satisfaction is more important than job security, while some people think that they cannot always expect job satisfaction, a permanent job is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. In this contemporary era, everyone needs to have some work or job to feed their younger ones. As we know earning has become the most important part of life. It can be seen that many people believe that job in interest is more important than the secure job. Whereas, some believe permanent job is more important. Thought, to do the work in our interest will improve our skill, permanent job is essential. The following paragraph give detailed description of both the views before making a final notes. To begin with, some persons believe that job satisfaction is more important. hence, if we will work in the field which we like then it will improve our skills. For example, if we are interested in computer sector, and we work in that then it will improve our knowledge and which will help us in the future. However, we will enjoy our work, and we will improve our self. As we know every garden have some weeds. Job security is also and important factor. Though, job security is place were you need to work with interest or without interest, it will provide you assurance of employment. Moreover, secure job has fixed monthly salary. For example, if the things will get costly, but if you have fixed earning then they will pay it. and you will not suffer from any of it. In conclusion, I can opine that job security is more important than the work in interest. Though job satisfaction is important, secure job is a good way from the other.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
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people
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think
that
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job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is more
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important
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
security
, while
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some
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people
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think
that they cannot always
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expect
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job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
, a permanent
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job
is more
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important
. Discuss both views and give your
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own
opinion.

In this contemporary era, everyone needs to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
to feed their younger ones.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
we know earning has become the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
part of life. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
than the secure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe permanent
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job
is more
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important
.
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Thought
, to do the
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work
in our
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interest
will
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improve
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
, permanent
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job
is essential. The following paragraph give detailed description of both the views
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before
making a final notes.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
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some
persons believe that
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job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is more
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important
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
hence
, if we will
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work
in the field which we like then it will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
For example
, if we
are interested
in computer sector, and we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in that then it will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
our knowledge and which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us in the future.
However
, we will enjoy our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, and we will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
our self.

“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
we know every garden have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
weeds.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
security
is
also
and
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important
factor. Though,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
security
is place were you need to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
or without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
, it will provide you assurance of employment.
Moreover
, secure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
monthly salary.
For example
, if the things will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
costly,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if you have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
earning then they will pay it. and you will not suffer from any of it.

In conclusion
, I can opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
security
is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
. Though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
, secure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way from the other.
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IELTS essay Job satisfaction or job security which one is more important.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
295 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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