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Government should spent more money on medicare and education rather than theater and sports stadiums

Government should spent more money on medicare and education rather than theater and sports stadiums lRy5b
Government ought to distribute more fund on healthcare and education rather than development of entertainment and sport sector. This essay corroborate that responsible authority should contribute money in equal portion between this two sectors beacuse both are essential for the development of country. In the begining, healthcare is the primary necessasity of every citizen, likewise education is equally most important for everyone in today's modern time. Medicare and education can improve better lifesyle and enable people to achieve their desired goals of life. consequently, these sectors increase literacy rate and life span of every individual beacuse of the existence of good aminities of hospitels and education. Healthier and educated people also participate effectively theirselves in the productivity and ultimately the growth of the country. Moreover, existence of great amount of educated people introduce day by day new technoliges which make country more self-dependent. In addition, expansion of movie theaters and sports stediums are parallelly crucial for country beacuse they play very vital role in economical and cultural development. Many entertainment shows and sports programme bring different culture of people together and make them aware about the distinct culture and their customs. Entertainment and sports events are themselves great sources of employment and revenue generation which provide opportunities to many people for their desired career and inspire them to join or take part in these sectors to achieve their dreams. Cinema and sports events extremely important tool to communicate any massage to society which bring wonderful changes in their believes. Conclusion, having considering the afore mentioned facts that it can be retreated that according to my view the above arguments are logically supportive because development of both sectors are predominant for the country which boos the growth of the country.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
ought to distribute more fund on healthcare and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of entertainment and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
.
The verb 'corroborate' is plural. Did you mean: "This essay corroborates"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
This essay corroborate
that responsible authority should contribute money in equal portion between this two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
Possible spelling mistake found.
beacuse
both are essential for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of country.

In the
Possible spelling mistake found.
begining
, healthcare is the primary
Possible spelling mistake found.
necessasity
of every citizen,
likewise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
equally
most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for everyone in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's modern time. Medicare and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
better
Possible spelling mistake found.
lifesyle
and enable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to achieve their desired goals of life.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
consequently
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
increase literacy rate and life span of every individual
Possible spelling mistake found.
beacuse
of the existence of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Possible spelling mistake found.
aminities
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
hospitels
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. Healthier and educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
also
participate
effectively
Possible spelling mistake found.
theirselves
in the productivity and
ultimately
the growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Moreover
, existence of great amount of educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
introduce day by day new
Possible spelling mistake found.
technoliges
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
more self-dependent.

In addition
, expansion of movie theaters and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
Possible spelling mistake found.
stediums
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
parallelly
crucial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
Possible spelling mistake found.
beacuse
they play
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
vital role in economical and cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
entertainment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
culture of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
together and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them aware about the distinct culture and their customs. Entertainment and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
are themselves great sources of employment and revenue generation which provide opportunities to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for their desired career and inspire them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
to achieve their dreams. Cinema and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
tool to communicate any
Possibly confused word: Did you mean "message" (= communication, or what is communicated) instead of 'massage' (= action of rubbing, kneading or hitting someone's body)?
massage
to society which bring wonderful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in their
Did you mean "beliefs" (noun) instead of believes (verb)?
believes
.

Conclusion, having considering the
Possible spelling mistake found.
afore
mentioned facts that it can
be retreated
that according to my

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
view
the above arguments are
logically
supportive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sectors
are predominant for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
which boos the growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
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IELTS essay Government should spent more money on medicare and education rather than theater and sports stadiums

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
289 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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