Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It is undeniable that a significant discovery of a The Acre tribe plays an indisputably critical role in a diversity of ethnic groups in Brazil.

It is undeniable that a significant discovery of a The Acre tribe plays an indisputably critical role in a diversity of ethnic groups in Brazil. jVd3y
It is undeniable that a significant discovery of a The Acre tribe plays an indisputably critical role in a diversity of ethnic groups in Brazil. This discovery is also the center of a number of controversies that whether the government should approve to leave the Acre tribe alone to continue their contented lifestyles or not. However, I suppose that authorities should have interventions on life of the Acre tribe in light of a great number of reasons. The first and foremost benefit of the interventions is that the standard of living of this tribe could be fostered to a higher level of developments. In fact, the tribe will be facilitated to gain stable concrete houses instead of their previous temporary wooden shelters. Thanks to this, they are able to set their mind in rest in stormy or rainy seasons. Besides, they are also instructed other ways of making ends meet such as cultivating fruit trees or breeding cattle in lieu of hunting and gathering. The second substantial advantage is that this community will receive better healthcare protections. Due to the fact that most members of the tribe died from diseases introduced by illegal loggers such as the flu, the others should be vaccinated as early as possible. With the helps of medical health policies, it could curb the death rates of viruses and increase their resistance and functions of immune system. The final invaluable thing is that they could obtain a great opportunity to integrate into a lot of aspects of modern life. Indeed, the best example of it is that tribal children have chances to attend school and acquire much more knowledge from basic to advanced levels. Besides, the members of the tribe will adopt Western-style clothing and a money-based economy. In conclusion, I am convinced that it is necessary to intervene to the lifestyles of the Acre tribe to make their life better and more developed. I strongly believe that it will be beneficial for the Acre tribe when they take assistance of the authorities.
It is undeniable that a significant discovery of
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "a" or "The" is left.
a The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Acre
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tribe
plays an
indisputably
critical role in a diversity of ethnic groups in Brazil. This discovery is
also
the center of a number of controversies that whether the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should approve to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Acre
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tribe
alone to continue their contented lifestyles or not.
However
, I suppose that authorities should have interventions on life of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Acre
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tribe
in light of a great number of reasons.

The
first
and foremost benefit of the interventions is that the standard of living of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tribe
could
be fostered
to a higher level of developments. In fact, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tribe
will
be facilitated
to gain stable concrete
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
instead
of their previous temporary wooden shelters. Thanks to this, they are able to set their mind in rest in stormy or rainy seasons.
Besides
, they are
also
instructed other ways of making ends
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
such as cultivating fruit trees or breeding cattle in lieu of hunting and gathering.

The second substantial advantage is that this community will receive better healthcare protections. Due to the fact that most members of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tribe
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
died
from diseases introduced by illegal loggers such as the flu, the others should
be vaccinated
as early as possible. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
of medical health policies, it could curb the death rates of viruses and increase their resistance and functions of immune system.

The final invaluable thing is that they could obtain a great opportunity to integrate into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
aspects of modern life.
Indeed
, the best example of it is that tribal children have chances to attend school and acquire much more knowledge from basic to advanced levels.
Besides
, the members of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tribe
will adopt Western-style clothing and a money-based economy.

In conclusion
, I
am convinced
that it is necessary to intervene to the lifestyles of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Acre
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tribe
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their life better and more developed. I
strongly
believe that it will be beneficial for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Acre
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tribe
when they take assistance of the authorities.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay It is undeniable that a significant discovery of a The Acre tribe plays an indisputably critical role in a diversity of ethnic groups in Brazil.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
337 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • It is undeniable that a significant discovery of a The Acre tribe plays an indisputably critical role in a diversity of ethnic groups in Brazil.