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It is often said that the subjects taught in schools are too academic in orientation and that it would be more useful for children to learn about practical matters such as home management, work and interpersonal skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

It is often said that the subjects taught in schools are too academic in orientation and that it would be more useful for children to learn about practical matters such as home management, work and interpersonal skills. v. 1
The primary purpose of educational institutions is to produce well-versed employees capable of completing their work with efficacy. In this regard, urging schools to focus on the practical aspects of the work at hand is a laudable initiative. Nevertheless, this essay disagrees with this viewpoint because academic knowledge is of paramount importance in Specialty occupations and it helps students to deal with various circumstances in a systemic approach. To begin with, while some occupations, such as waitressing and barber, necessitate a little academic background, other fields of work such as law or medicine require a profound knowledge of the subject area. In the former situation, the know-how can easily be transmitted from the manager to the trainee. However, in the case of law and medicine, one individual is unlikely to retain such a vast amount of facts which can only be embedded in the books, explaining the years of academic studies which the student must spent before being permitted to practice. In the course of their career, modifications in law or health practices are likely to be common occurrences, requiring continuing education. As such, an academic learning is a must for certain professions. Furthermore, I personally believe that academic teaching favours the student by adopting a systemic approach which can be replicated across all situations. Practical experience often negatively biases certain students, for instance, a hairdressing trainee may only be tasked with a particular type of haircut since this is the only one demanded by the customers. Through academic teaching, school ensures that the student face all types of situation and document their material in such a way that students can easily review them at their own convenience. In conclusion, academic knowledge is of paramount importance for speciality occupations and it also provides students with approaches in all situations they may face when enter labour force. Therefore, the opinion that practical skills are more useful than academic ability cannot be supported. This essay argues that theory-based lessons should continue to be appreciated in school settings.
The primary purpose of educational institutions is to produce well-versed employees capable of completing their work with efficacy. In this regard, urging schools to focus on the practical aspects of the work at hand is a laudable initiative.
Nevertheless
, this essay disagrees with this viewpoint
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
knowledge is of paramount importance in Specialty occupations and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to deal with various circumstances in a systemic approach.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
occupations, such as waitressing and barber, necessitate a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
background, other fields of work such as law or medicine require a profound knowledge of the subject area. In the former
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
, the know-how can
easily
be transmitted
from the manager to the trainee.
However
, in the case of law and medicine, one individual is unlikely to retain such a vast amount of facts which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be embedded
in the books, explaining the years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
studies which the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
spent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
being permitted
to practice. In the course of their career, modifications in law or health practices are likely to be common occurrences, requiring continuing education. As such, an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
learning is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
for certain professions.

Furthermore
, I
personally
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
teaching
Possible spelling mistake. 'favours' is British English.
favours
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
by adopting a systemic approach which can
be replicated
across all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
. Practical experience
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
negatively
biases certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
for instance
, a hairdressing trainee may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be tasked
with a particular type of haircut since this is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one demanded by the customers. Through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
teaching, school ensures that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
face all types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
and document their material in such a way that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
easily
review them at their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
convenience.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
knowledge is of paramount importance for
Possible spelling mistake. 'speciality' is British English.
speciality
occupations and it
also
provides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with approaches in all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
they may face when enter
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
force.
Therefore
, the opinion that practical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are more useful than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
ability cannot
be supported
. This essay argues that theory-based lessons should continue to
be appreciated
in school settings.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
Learn everything you can, anytime you can, from anyone you can; there will always come a time when you will be grateful you did.
Sarah Caldwell

IELTS essay It is often said that the subjects taught in schools are too academic in orientation and that it would be more useful for children to learn about practical matters such as home management, work and interpersonal skills. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
335 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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