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It is obvious that Internet has been a great importance (in which fields?) these days. There are more and more people working away from offices or traditional workplace and using many kinds of Internet devices instead.

It is obvious that Internet has been a great importance (in which fields? ) these days. There are more and more people working away from offices or traditional workplace and using many kinds of Internet devices instead. 1kK8X
It is obvious that Internet has been a great importance (in which fields? ) these days. There are more and more people working away from offices or traditional workplace and using many kinds of Internet devices instead. The following article is to analyse the advantages and disadvantage that the employees and the employers may suffer when using this kind of method. First of all, it is very convenient when the employees can work everywhere they want as long as they have the Internet connected devices such as: laptop, mobile phone, ipad, . . . They can also sit down in the library, coffee shop, bedroom, . . . . to work and run the deadline. Especially, when they have some troubles with their health which they cannot go to work as previous, but now they can. Secondly, everyone know that the modern day is the day of techniques. Every person has the Internet connected devices so that it build a lot in the improvement of some jobs like: sales, telesales, marketing, . . because they can easily connect with other people and have the better results. Thirdly, last but not least, in this important time, when the spread of Corona virus cover all over the world, people who work away from offices is one of the most useful way to protect themselves, their families and public from the virus. However, regarding the future, this kind of working affects some working skills. Obviously, people when work alone at home maybe lose teamwork's skill. That is the essential skill which every colonies need. Furthermore, the employees easily get stressed if they have to work alone for a very long time. This will affect the quality of working and results. In conclusion, working away from the office or traditional workplace, using various Internet connected devices brings both pros and cons. However, the advantages this kind of working still outweigh its disadvantages, importantly during this quarantine time
It is obvious that Internet has been a great importance (in which fields?
Loose punctuation mark.
)
these days. There are more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
away from offices or traditional workplace and using
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kinds
of Internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
instead
. The following article is to
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
the advantages and disadvantage that the employees and the employers may suffer when using this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kind
of method.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
convenient when the employees can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
everywhere they want as long as they have the Internet connected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
such as: laptop, mobile phone,
Possible spelling mistake found.
ipad
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
They can
also
sit down in the library, coffee shop, bedroom
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and run the deadline.
Especially
, when they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
troubles with their health which they cannot go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as previous,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
they can.
Secondly
, everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "knows", "knew".
know
that the modern day is the day of techniques. Every person has the Internet connected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that it build a lot in the improvement of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
jobs like: sales, telesales, marketing
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
because
they can
easily
connect with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and have the better results.
Thirdly
, last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, in this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
time, when the spread of
The term "Coronavirus" (= disease) is spelled as one word.
Corona virus
cover all over the world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
away from offices is one of the most useful
Please check whether a plural form of 'way' should be used.
way
to protect themselves, their families and public from the virus.

However
, regarding the future, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kind
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
affects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
Obviously
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
alone at home maybe lose teamwork's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.
That is
the essential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
which every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "coloni", "colony"?
colonies
need.
Furthermore
, the employees
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
if they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
alone for a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
long time. This will affect the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
and results.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
away from the office or traditional workplace, using various Internet connected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
brings both pros and cons.
However
, the advantages this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kind
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
still
outweigh its disadvantages,
importantly
during this quarantine time
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IELTS essay It is obvious that Internet has been a great importance (in which fields? ) these days. There are more and more people working away from offices or traditional workplace and using many kinds of Internet devices instead.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
322 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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