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It is more important for a building to serve a purpose than to look beautiful. Architects should not worry about producing as a work of art. Do you agree or disagree? v.2

It is more important for a building to serve a purpose than to look beautiful. Architects should not worry about producing as a work of art. v. 2
In this new modern way of living the build of infrastructures is the most essential, because of the climate change. Nowadays it is crucial to make a home with strong materials as well as looking pretty of the taste of the costumer. The Architects should concern the quality than quantity because it is the huge part to raise a building. In this essay, I will discuss my idea about compromise and dispute in this statement. The company, should think first the safety of their consumer and also concern about the situation of their population. To begin with, I say I agree this issue because it's also essential to make building with purpose as well as looking beautiful, In the eyes of the seller. Today's it is indemand the mankind bough a house in the housing project. For example, in the television advertisement everytime there is a model of home, but people, make sure it is high demand in the market. However, buy in the village it is wonderful because they are far away from pollution, and masses there is safety. Although, it is expensive but it is comfortable to live. A part of this, humankind also disagree, if the the Engineer make a good higher price of building, Because not all of them can afford to achieve that kind of homely. For instance, the human who is have a wealth and cash have the rigth to sell that stuff. Moreover, the nature now is not like in the past century, now the weather is always have a tragedy like typhoon, earthquake and flood. Resultin in this the nation is risky because of this global warming. In conclusion, today's it is not important the quality of the home, needed now is the strength of the materials. In my opinion, people they necessary to check first their house they can bough because it is the most posibility of this new era. In this new generation they need to become practical and also wise because the nature now is not safe.
In this new modern way of living the build of infrastructures is the most essential,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. Nowadays it is crucial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a home with strong materials
as well
as looking pretty of the taste of the costumer. The Architects should concern the quality than quantity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is the huge part to raise a building. In this essay, I will discuss my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
about compromise and dispute in this statement. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
, should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
first
the safety of their consumer and
also
concern about the situation of their population.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, I say I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
this issue
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it's
also
essential to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
building with purpose
as well
as looking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
, In the eyes of the seller.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
's it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
indemand
the mankind bough a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
in the housing project.
For example
, in the television advertisement
Possible spelling mistake found.
everytime
there is a model of home,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
sure it is high demand in the market.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
in the village it is wonderful
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are far away from pollution, and masses there is safety. Although, it is expensive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is comfortable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
.

A part of this, humankind
also
disagree, if
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "the" is left.
the the
Engineer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
higher price of building,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
not all of them can afford to achieve that kind of homely.
For instance
, the human who is
Consider using a past participle here: "had".
have
a wealth and cash have the
Possible spelling mistake found.
rigth
to sell that stuff.
Moreover
, the nature
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
is not like in the past century,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
the weather is always
Consider using a past participle here: "had".
have
a tragedy like typhoon, earthquake and flood.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Resultin
in this the nation is risky
because of this
global warming.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's it is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
the quality of the home, needed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
is the strength of the materials. In my opinion,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
they necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
first
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
they
The word 'bough' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
can bough
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is the most
Possible spelling mistake found.
posibility
of this new era.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
this new generation they need to become practical and
also
wise
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the nature
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
is not safe.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay It is more important for a building to serve a purpose than to look beautiful. Architects should not worry about producing as a work of art. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
338 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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