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It is important to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. to what extent do you agree and disagree with this opinion? what sort of punishment should parents and teachers be v.3

It is important to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. what sort of punishment should parents and teachers be v. 3
We often observe some people using technology to seek medical advice to their illnesses. This knowledge can be lifesaving in case of emergencies. However, it could also turn out to be catastrophic if misinterpreted. This essay will ponder over the positive and negative outcomes of using technology as a replacement for a doctor. Often times, we observe people looking up the treatment on the internet whenever they get sick. This could turn out to be lifesaving in case of emergency situations. Because the way someone is treated in the first few minutes after they becomes severely ill, or meets with an accident is paramount for the survival of that patient. For someone who is not trained in the field of medicine, this advice they found on the internet can serve as a guide until the medical help arrives. In this way, the medical advice found on the internet can actually help save a life. But, the one negative aspect of this practice is, the content that is found online may not always be accurate and seldom is fact checked. Also, there is a high chance people reading it can misunderstand it, as they lack the necessary knowledge to correctly interpret the medical literature. Due to which, they end up hurting themselves. Many doctors complain that they come across many patients who end up getting severely sick from self medicating. To conclude, the technology has certainly made it easy for us to get the medical advice online. This advice could turn out to be very useful in case the medical help isn't immediately available. But, it could also have bad consequences when followed by someone with inadequate medical knowledge. So, I believe it is better to leave the job of treating a disease to a medical professional.
We
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
observe
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using technology to seek
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advice
to their illnesses. This knowledge can be lifesaving in case of emergencies.
However
, it could
also
turn out to be catastrophic if misinterpreted. This essay will ponder over the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
outcomes of using technology as a replacement for a doctor.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Often
times, we observe
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
looking up the treatment on the internet whenever they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
sick. This could turn out to be lifesaving in case of emergency situations.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
the way someone
is treated
in the
first
few minutes after they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "become"
becomes
severely
ill, or meets with an accident is paramount for the survival of that patient. For someone who is not trained in the field of medicine, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advice
they found on the internet can serve as a guide until the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
arrives. In this way, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advice
found on the internet can actually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
save a life.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, the one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspect of this practice is, the content that
is found
online may not always be accurate and seldom is fact
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
checked
.
Also
, there is a high chance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
reading it can misunderstand it, as they lack the necessary knowledge to
correctly
interpret the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
literature. Due to which, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up hurting themselves.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
doctors complain that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
across
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
patients who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up getting
severely
sick from self medicating.

To conclude
, the technology has
certainly
made it easy for us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advice
online. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advice
could turn out to be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
useful in case the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
isn't immediately available.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, it could
also
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
consequences when followed by someone with inadequate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
knowledge.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, I believe it is better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
the job of treating a disease to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
professional.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay It is important to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. what sort of punishment should parents and teachers be v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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