Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It is important to keep your old friends than t is to make new friends. Do you agree, or disagree with this statament. Use specific reasons and examples to explain your idea. v.1

It is important to keep your old friends than t is to make new friends. Do you agree, or disagree with this statament. Use specific reasons and examples to explain your idea. v. 1
It is true that in contemporary life people in many parts of the world are able to do their shopping, work and communicate with each other via the cyberspace. While there are clear positive aspects of this trend, there are also negative aspects of having less face-to-face contact with other people. On the one hand, the internet can be very handy in many ways. Many people use it to keep in touch with friends and family, using Facebook, or What’s App to send instant messages or to enjoy a quick chat. Many also choose online shopping, thus saving time and petrol on trips to the supermarket as well as hunting around different sites for bargains. Furthermore, society also benefits from modern technology. To illustrate, people can do their tasks from home and that in turn reduce the number of private cars on the streets. Fewer traffic jams and less pollution will make the cities better places to live in. On the other hand, there are some negative impacts of this trend as well. Firstly, as social beings, people need personal contacts, and virtual friendships which are formed online may not be genuine. The media carries many horror stories of youngsters who have fallen prey to paedophiles, for example. Secondly, online shopping is not always appropriate, depending on the item. It is best, for instance, to try on clothes before buying, and while a bookworm can find almost any book title that they want online, they will certainly miss browsing the shelves of bookstores. Finally, personal interaction with work colleagues can generate ideas and avoid misunderstandings. In conclusion, performing the routine tasks easily and quickly from home with the help of technology brings lot of benefits and people can save their important time and energy. However this trend has some negative impacts on both the society and the people that we should be aware of.
It is true that in contemporary life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parts of the world are able to do their shopping, work and communicate with each other via the cyberspace. While there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspects of this trend, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects of having less face-to-face contact with other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

On the one hand, the internet can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
handy in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch with friends and family, using Facebook, or What’s App to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
instant messages or to enjoy a quick chat.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
also
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
shopping,
thus
saving time and petrol on trips to the supermarket
as well
as hunting around
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sites for bargains.
Furthermore
, society
also
benefits from modern technology. To illustrate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can do their tasks from home and that in turn
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the number of private cars on the streets. Fewer traffic jams and less pollution will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the cities better places to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts of this trend
as well
.
Firstly
, as social beings,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need personal contacts, and virtual friendships which
are formed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
may not be genuine. The media carries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
horror stories of youngsters who have fallen prey to
Possible spelling mistake. 'paedophiles' is British English.
paedophiles
,
for example
.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
shopping is not always appropriate, depending on the item. It is best,
for instance
, to try on clothes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
buying, and while a bookworm can find almost any book title that they want
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
, they will
certainly
miss browsing the shelves of bookstores.
Finally
, personal interaction with work colleagues can generate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and avoid misunderstandings.

In conclusion
, performing the routine tasks
easily
and
quickly
from home with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of technology brings
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
benefits and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can save their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
time and energy.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
this trend has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on both the society and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that we should be aware of.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay It is important to keep your old friends than t is to make new friends. Do you agree, or disagree with this statament. Use specific reasons and examples to explain your idea. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts