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it is good for younger the life expectancy of older people are increasing due to the development of medical science.

it is good for younger the life expectancy of older people are increasing due to the development of medical science. Wy3AD
At this present era, the development of the medicines fields took a boom phase and the majority of people are lasting for a long time comparing to older generation. There are many people who advocate that it has several pros while other counterparts are saying it has some cons also which I will illuminate in the upcoming paragraph. To begin with, older people are more experienced and intelligent because they have faced many failures in their journey. So, it aids to the younger citizens to know about the real life situation and how to deal with those situation with ease. secondly, elderly people can assist them and provide knowledge which aids them to put their optimum effort in certain fields. So, they can achieve their goal in the near future. At the flip side of the Coin, due to the advancement in medical sciences the elderly people are lasting longer. So, the younger citizens has some cons because the company wants well experienced and mature worker plus all these abilities have already possess by the elderly people. Younger people have less chance to show their abilities and power due to the competition. For instance, according to the Kathmandu university (KU) had disclosed in 2019, almost 50% of the younger citizens are unemployed due to the well experienced older people. To conclude, authorities should provide more and more job opportunities to the younger ones so, they can do a productive activities and can show a new ideas and skills.
At this present era, the development of the medicines fields took a boom phase and the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are lasting for a long time comparing to older generation. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who advocate that it has several pros while other counterparts are saying it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cons
also
which I will illuminate in the upcoming paragraph. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more experienced and intelligent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have faced
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
failures in their journey.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, it aids to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
citizens to know about the real life situation and how to deal with
Did you mean "this situation" or "those situations"?
those situation
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
secondly
, elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can assist them and provide knowledge which aids them to put their optimum effort in certain fields.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they can achieve their goal in the near future. At the flip side of the Coin, due to the advancement in medical sciences the elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are lasting longer.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
citizens has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cons
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
wants well experienced and mature worker plus all these abilities have already possess by the elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have less chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their abilities and power due to the competition.
For instance
, according to the Kathmandu university (KU) had disclosed in 2019, almost 50% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
citizens
are unemployed
due to the well experienced older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
To conclude
, authorities should provide more and more job opportunities to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
younger
ones
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, they can do a productive activities and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
a new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.
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IELTS essay it is good for younger the life expectancy of older people are increasing due to the development of medical science.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
248 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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