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It is generally believed that the internet is an excellent means of communication but some people suggest that it may not be the best place to find information. v.8

It is generally believed that the internet is an excellent means of communication but some people suggest that it may not be the best place to find information. v. 8
In recent years, the internet has brought significant changes to our lives especially as tools of communication. Yet, there remain some disagreements that there has been a doubt from people to the internet in looking for true information. While, there are certainly valid arguments to the contrary. I personally believe that the benefits of the internet far outweigh its drawbacks. First of all, it is an indisputable fact that the internet has revolutionised the way we communicate. Despite there are some problems of social isolation, for example a problem occasionally seen in people who spend their time with computer terminal rather than relating to people in the real world, most of us have been benefited by the internet as useful and powerful tools of communication both to contact with loved ones in faraway places and to predict the price movement in global trade. Take the use of video call internet access as an example; people can communicate to their relatives by using it to make clear face to face conversation in terms of releasing homesickness each other. As a result, people’s sense of belonging would increase and distance problems have no meaning anymore. Turning to the other side of the argument, the internet, although, has placed the entire world at our fingertips and make all of the information can be accessed by a few click of a mouse. Admittedly, not all of them available on the internet are reliable and helpful because it could be changed by irresponsible people. This phenomenon causing some people tend more to choose printed newspaper than to read online information. Now, however, there have been provided newspapers that could be downloaded into a smartphone as the mobile trusted information. All things considered, I once again restate that the internet has had a positive impact on modern life because of its influence on communication. Nevertheless, there is a think concerning the flow of information on the internet not all covering true news.
In recent years, the internet has brought significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
to our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
especially
as tools of communication.
Yet
, there remain
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disagreements that there has been a doubt from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to the internet in looking for true
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, there are
certainly
valid arguments to the contrary. I
personally
believe that the benefits of the internet far outweigh its drawbacks.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it is an indisputable fact that the internet has
Possible spelling mistake. 'revolutionised' is British English.
revolutionised
the way we communicate. Despite there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems of social isolation,
for example
a problem
occasionally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who spend their time with computer terminal
rather
than relating to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the real world, most of us have
been benefited
by the internet as useful and powerful tools of communication both to contact with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
ones in faraway places and to predict the price movement in global trade. Take the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of video call internet access as an example;
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can communicate to their relatives by using it to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
face to face conversation in terms of releasing homesickness each other.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
sense of belonging would increase and distance problems have no meaning anymore.

Turning to the other side of the argument, the internet, although, has placed the entire world at our fingertips and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
Consider using "all the".
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
can
be accessed
by a
Possible agreement error. The noun click seems to be countable; consider using: "few clicks".
few click
of a mouse.
Admittedly
, not all of them available on the internet are reliable and helpful
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
by irresponsible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. This phenomenon causing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend more to choose printed newspaper than to read online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
,
however
, there have
been provided
newspapers that could
be downloaded
into a smartphone as the mobile trusted information.

All things considered, I once again restate that the internet has had a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on modern life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its influence on communication.
Nevertheless
, there is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
concerning the flow of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
on the internet not all covering true news.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
11Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay It is generally believed that the internet is an excellent means of communication but some people suggest that it may not be the best place to find information. v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
326 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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