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It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instances for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.1

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instances for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. v. 1
Many artists or football players claim that their talent is of genetic origin. They did not have to learn music or sport to become that talented. Having said that, a growing number of people believe they any child can be the best chess player or the fastest swimmer in the world as long as he receives the right teaching and proper direction. In this essay, I will look at both sides of the argument and give my opinion. First and foremost, many believe that any child can be a genius one. It is only about how much his parents are paying attention to his needs and what do they do to develop these hobbies. For example, a psychology professor agreed with his wife to raise their children as the books of development and psychology says, and now their daughter is the second-best chess player in the world. In my view, it all starts from home when a mother tries to show her baby various options and different areas of play. Therefore, he will identify the available components around him and try to discover his own interests. As the children grow up, they need continuous support and encouragement to keep his certain hobby, such as music, more developed. This will not happen without professional help to have the famous, talented artist at the end. On the contrary, there is a common belief that many celebrities are famous because they were born with specific talents not because they were taught to practice these talents. To sum up, I strongly believe that either born talented or not, any person can be whatever he wants only by the continuous hard work and practice, not by genetics.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
artists or football players claim that their talent is of genetic origin. They did not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
learn music or sport to become that talented. Having said that, a growing number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe they any child can be the best chess player or the fastest swimmer in the world as long as he receives the right teaching and proper direction. In this essay, I will look at both sides of the argument and give my opinion.

First
and foremost,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
believe that any child can be a genius one. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
about how much his parents are paying attention to his needs and what do they do to develop these hobbies.
For example
, a psychology professor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
with his wife to raise their children as the books of development and psychology says, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
their daughter is the second-best chess player in the world.

In my view, it all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
from home when a mother tries to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
her baby various options and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
areas of play.
Therefore
, he will identify the available components around him and try to discover his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
interests. As the children grow up, they need continuous support and encouragement to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
his certain hobby, such as music, more developed. This will not happen without professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to have the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
, talented artist at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.
On the contrary
, there is a common belief that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
celebrities are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
were born
with specific talents not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
were taught
to practice these talents.

To sum up, I
strongly
believe that either born talented or not, any person can be whatever he wants
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
by the continuous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work and practice, not by genetics.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instances for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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